I just read this Vice article covering a sex party in Toronto for the disabled: http://www.vice.com/en_ca/read/an-inside-look-from-the-toronto-club-that-hosted-a-sex-party-for-the-disabled?utm_source=vicefbca
In my years in the fetish scene & as a sex worker I’ve encountered a fair number of sexually adventurous and/or kinky “other-abled” people. The brain is the biggest sex organ, so even if someone is in a wheel chair, is down a limb, has coordination issues from some medical condition, is visually impaired or something else doesn’t mean that they’re not sexually healthy, curious, adventurous or active.
The article also reminded me of the movie “The Sessions” where a man in an iron lung who wishes to lose his virginity contacts a professional sex surrogate with the help of his therapist and priest: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1866249/
It was a fantastic movie. Very well done.
My experiences with other-abled people have made me more accepting & open-minded.
There was the foot fetishist is a wheel chair who in the middle of our session needed to empty his bladder. In the position we were in it was just easier for me to fetch his pee jug for him. As I was emptying the jug into the toilet for him I noticed how I felt more like a nurse or caregiver than a Dominatrix in that moment. But it was the practical thing to do.
Another very sweet client was in such a way that he couldn’t really reach his own penis. He had a caregiver to wash him but you can imagine how he looked forward to our sessions…those rare orgasms were intense & therapeutic.
I’ve had quite a few fans on web cam who have mobility issues. The web cam sessions gave them excitement & interaction.
I even have a story from my teens, long before I was Mistress T, when I spent the night with a friend who was paralyzed from the waist down. He was so happy to just cuddle & give me pleasure, to have the intimate human contact even though he couldn’t have intercourse. I didn’t do it because I felt sorry for him…it was just a casual thing, we weren’t dating, but I was attracted to him. Since the focus was pretty much all on my pleasure it was a uniquely satisfying experience. I confess, I’ve often looked at attractive men in wheel chairs & wondered if they’d be extra skilled at pleasing a woman with their mouths & hands. The way a blind person has better hearing.
I’m sure disabled people want to be liked for who they are despite their disability, rather than “because” of their disability. Which brings me full circle to the Vice article that inspired my blog post today.
I think a sex party for the disabled is a fantastic idea & I applaud the organizers in Toronto who put this together. I wonder how many others are like me, interested or curious about sex with people who are ‘other-abled’ but are shy or unsure of how to meet someone. You don’t want to rock up to some guy on the street & say: “I see you’re in a wheel chair so I’m thinking you’re an ace pussy licker, wanna mess around?” It seems de-humanizing or objectifying to have the disability be the launch point. So a sex party would be an amazing exploration opportunity for the disabled & those who are interested…well, there are those who actually have specific fetishes for disabilities but I’m not an expert on that so I’ll bow out before I say something uninformed.
I feel like this blog post has gone on too long. I am sensitive to everyone’s short attention span these days. So I’ll just trail off & recommend you read that article.
Cheers,
Mistress T
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I have always been tempted to have you address this subject when you have asked fans for blog suggestions but was to embarrassed to do so. In my previous life I was fortunate to experience a full and satisfying sex life. My current reality of becoming widowed and disabled had made that a distant memory. But you dear lady have helped me to recapture some of what I lost. Your excellent erotic vids have helped this disabled individual experience a level of sexual satisfaction I thought was lost forever. Disabled individuals need and deserve to enjoy a full and satisfying sex life. Thank you Mistress T. I will be forever grateful.
I’m very touched by your comment. Thank you. xo
Well few years ago I worked with Disabled person and at a team meeting some of my female co-workers said that they won’t wash some Down syndrome males cause they always try to mastubate while they are in the bad. This was the best team meeting ever cause me and one of my female-co workers and at this time my girlfriend said: ” Hey we are in Hamburg, there is St Pauli and the Reeperbahn, we will find a whore for them.”
Glad the Idea was not only from me but it was a hard discussion. After talking with their parents ( to be clear, the disabled persons where older than 25y) we got the ok to find a whore, hell that was not as easy as I thought but finally we find one.
She had no problem and the guys where really happy. this is more than 15 y ago and the whore visit them one or two times a year.
to make it short, it’s great to her about a party for disabled and I really hope the don’t forget people with mental disability, like Down syndrome.
best wishes
slave0815
Your post resonates with kindness and caring. It is easy to default to the stereotypical Domme persona and I enjoy your posts because you don’t. That you raised and discussed this topic, albeit triggered by reading another’s, reveals your thoughtful and introspective nature. Kudos!
I am fully-abled, but perhaps if I were to limp up to your door . . . . . . ( j k !!)
Many years ago I read an article on a newspaper about a whore who specialized in disabled people. I was impressed by her compassion and understanding. Till then I had never thought about it, but this article made me realize how low-profile that issue is kept. She mentioned a lot of extreme cases, like people with serious disabilities (v.g. very badly burnt), and she explained how careful she needed to be, to show enough affection / be close enough for any sexual activity, but without causing them physical or psychological pain. The whole article was quite an eye-opener for me.
Your post made me remember it. It’s good that we don’t forget that disabled people should also have their sexual needs fulfilled, if it can be done.
Thank you for this post and your thoughts. I’m a paraplegic and what you said is so encouraging. I have a girlfriend and feel like my sex life is fine, but sometimes I’m afraid i can’t give “it” to my girlfriend. Even since we are together for over 10 years and she never complained. Just the opposit. I stil can get a hard one with the help of Drugs but i can’t feel my dick. And so i focus more on her pleasure. Including lots of pussy licking while she focuses on my extra sensitive nippels. But as i said sometimes i can’t believe that i’m enough for her. Your post helped a lot. So again: thank you. you’re Great.
10 years and she’s never complained…but you’re still not sure? *smile* What would it take to convince you she’s satisfied & happy? 20 years? Sounds like you’ll get to find out:-)
xo
Mistress T
Yeah. Obviously I’m not the god of self-esteem. Maybe time will fix that. Probably it will not. But a beautiful and adorable Lady telling me “he, you give me naughty thoughts.” wouldn’t hurt either. So next time you see a wheelchair driver and you feel that way: Tell him. I’m quite sure you’ll make his day.