FREE PORN for doing a good deed!

I’m re-upping the Kiva Micro-Loan thingy again this year! For 6 years I’ve offered this year-round, but I push it a little harder in December. Here’s the original post with more details:

Loan $ to a worthwhile cause & get FREE PORN!

Basically $50 gets you a free month of porn. This year I’ll do 3 months for $100.

xo

Mistress T

Becoming a Better Man

I recently received an email from a 21 year old fella who asked for my guidance in becoming a better man. He said he didn’t have positive male role models & believed the tutelage of a strong woman would benefit him.

The skeptical might view this as a trick to get me to role play a fantasy with him, not to actually obtain helpful info to improve his real life…& as it turns out, you’d be right. After tweeting asking my fans for suggestions to help younger men seeking to become better humans the ungrateful rascal told me off for not taking him on as a personal slave. (I’m not accepting new slaves at the moment but he didn’t take the perceived rejection gracefully.)

No matter! I think the advice my fans provided was fantastic & I’m sure there are younger men reading this who would benefit so I’ve listed some of the reading suggestions along with youtube stuff that might be helpful. I haven’t read everything on this list but at a glance they seem to have value & positive reviews.

I’ll also share a few bits of advice I personally think is helpful for younger people:

– You have 2 ears & 1 mouth. That means it’s better to listen at least twice as much as you speak. Practice the art of active listening. Not only will you learn more but you’ll make better connections with those who love to feel heard (that would be everyone).

– To thine own self be true. Be honest with yourself about how you really feel about stuff. You can manage or control your behavior but your feelings are a different story. Learn to accept the full spectrum of your feelings: sadness, fear, anger, frustration, joy, love, excitement, nervousness, anxiety, lust, impatience, numbness, relief, gratitude, vulnerability, etc. Feel the feeling in your body, witness it, ask yourself what message the feeling brings or is there another root to the feeling (like the root of anger might be hurt or sadness or a feeling of being excluded, etc.) Accept the feeling with warm curiosity and non-judgement. Let the feeling pass when it’s ready. Don’t wallow in it but don’t rush it through or stuff it down wishing you felt differently.

– Cultivate empathy by trying to understand things from the other persons perspective. Your feelings matter but the world doesn’t revolve around you. Find the balance of empathy for yourself AND others.

– Have integrity. If you say you’ll do something, do it. Keep your word. Be reliable. Take the high road.

– Be kind for the sake of being kind. Don’t always expect an immediate reward for doing something nice for someone. Learn to enjoy the feeling of just doing something good or doing the right thing.

– Be grateful for what you do have. There is always something to be grateful for no matter how bad things get. “I cried because I had no shoes, then I met a man who had no feet.” – Mahatma Gandhi

– If having good sex with women in real life is important to you choose the porn you view carefully. Seek out porn with regular people having real sex/women having real orgasms. Most porn is entertainment, not education. Sex in real life is not like most porn which tends to lack intimacy, genuine connection, high-level communication, authentic female orgasms & realistic pacing with warm up. Try searching “ethical porn” or “feminist porn”.

Google search example: https://www.bustle.com/p/8-places-to-watch-ethical-porn-that-focuses-on-female-pleasure-according-to-a-feminist-pornographer-9108930

There’s a lot more I could say but I understand attention spans are short. Do your own research to find what resonates with you! There’s loads of stuff on youtube & plenty of great podcasts, TedTalks, etc. The internet is full of helpful stuff to improve yourself. If having a good therapist is accessible to you either through work/an employee assistance program or if you can afford one, there’s hardly anyone that can’t benefit from therapy. Seek good friendships with men & women of different ages. Be there for them, build your own community to learn from each other. Learn to care about others feelings & how to share your feelings in a way that connects you with others authentically. Lastly, be kind to yourself. Be the best friend, parent, cheerleader, confidant to yourself you could ever want or need. Self care, yo.

Reading suggestions:

The Tao of Pooh & The Te of Piglet by Benjamin Hoff

Audiobook for the Tao of Pooh: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ksVgOSJ_Kv0

 

Models: Attract Women Through Honesty by Mark Manson

Top 5 lessons from “Attract Women Through Honesty”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hs0d7Da8ufo

 

Way of the Peaceful Warrior and its sequel by Dan Millman

Dan Millman’s TedTalk: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MDL85fzdc1g

 

The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho

 

The Four Agreements by Miguel Ruiz with Janet Mills

Helpful vid on The Four Agreements on youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HElfaDPwZ6c

 

Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl

Audiobook for “Man’s Search for Meaning” on youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zF65lvwQPbw

 

Ishmael- Daniel Quinn

 

Tao of the Wu by Rza

Some of Rza on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Th-CEx-NEms

 

A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius by David Eggers

 

The Descent of Man by Grayson Perry

 

The Courage To Be Disliked- Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga

 

Zen & The Art of Motorcycle Maintenance by Robert M. Pirsig

(Without even reading this great book the story of it may be inspirational in terms of tenacity: “Pirsig received a remarkable 126 rejections before an editor finally accepted it for publication–and he did so thinking it would never make a bit of profit. Then it was on best-selling lists for decades. Initially, the book sold at least 5 million copies worldwide.”

Audiobook of Zen & the Art of” on youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ClA9wO8GaqQ

xo

Mistress T

PS: Got suggestions? Please put them in the comments! Thanks!

A Not So Unlikely Friendship with TS Rianna James

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Those who have followed me closely might have noticed some hot scenes featuring women with cocks. Some of those scenes are particularly hot because of my acute attraction to the person. I don’t have a fetish for trans women as a concept, I’ve just really been into some who I’ve had the opportunity to work with.

I confess, when I first saw Rianna, I didn’t know she was trans. I just thought she was a sexy human. I found her smile infectious. We’d run into each other at parties, we had many mutual friends & acquaintances. There might have been flirting.

I liked her as a person & eventually I was intrigued by the idea of what she had under her skirt.

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We’ve become closer lately & I’ve enjoyed taking pics & vids of her. You might find it titillating knowing that I was behind the camera for recent & upcoming pics/vids.

Rianna loves interacting with fans on cam. Like, really loves it. She’s quite the expert on many sexual topics & I feel she has a lot to teach guys about orgasm control, ass play, water sports, worship, BDSM, sexual health, as well as combining some holistic techniques to achieve better orgasms.

She doesn’t need any promotion from me. She’s plenty busy & turns business away as she also has a well-balanced personal life. (Though if you’re curious: https://www.tsriannajames.com/) I guess I just want to brag about a neat person I’m getting to know…& to do one of those things I’m passionate about: humanizing sex workers. Trans sex workers in particular are often objectified. Rianna is a playful sex tsunami but she’s also a great cook, likes flower arranging, is sweet to my pet Lovebird, enjoys yoga, watches at least an hour every day of educational youtube vids to expand her knowledge & is good to people. She’s got her head screwed on right & her positive attitude has injected some lovely energy into my life.

rianna2 rianna3 rianna4

xo

Mistress T

Members Site: www.MistressT.net

C4S (Buy vids or just send a TRIBUTE! I love random tributes!): http://www.clips4sale.com/23869

IWantClips: https://iwantclips.com/store/57715/Mistress-T

Manyvids: https://www.manyvids.com/MistressT

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

Let’s catch up!

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Hello darlings,

It’s been awhile so we have much to catch up on!

My book came out in December which ended up being more emotional than I had prepared for. If you’re one of the many who have now read it you might think it naive for me to say that but it was all logistics at the end, pushing to get it out before xmas. When the feedback started to come in I was a bit caught off guard. The first wave came from my keenest fans and closest peers in the industry, so the feedback was effusive, often very personal and intimate.

I then made the book available to my personal circle, something I hadn’t thought I’d do but the feedback was so positive from the adult industry I decided to make myself even more vulnerable by inviting people in my private life to read it. I have a fairly large social circle having been an active part of the kink party and sex party or “swinger” community for many years.

I’ve already used the term “vulnerable” which describes the feeling most accurately. The interesting thing about that is how it gives others permission to be vulnerable too. Most readers connect with certain aspects of the book, specifically the harder parts. I don’t want to spoil it for anyone who hasn’t read it but I think something meaningful happens when two people connect over a similar challenging experience.

I said it was an emotional time so it bears explaining that my primary relationship of the last few years also ended in the fall. When I made the post about open relationships being the cats ass, all was well. It was actually the healthiest relationship I’d ever had until the last end. I’ll spare you the details. Break-ups are as common as breathing air & the details are really only interesting to those involved.

After the break up I released the book & went on a bit of a rampage, as you do. Sex parties & debauchery. No one could say my life is boring!

I also ended up with a cute pet Lovebird who has been such a joy. She’s very social, loves to be on me as much as possible but can be a little bratty & bitey. Sometimes I feel like I’m dealing with a 4 inch version of myself. Such attitude!

So I’ve been fucking & partying my way through the Canadian winter, basically, while mourning & processing the end of the relationship. I’m grateful for the support of wonderful old & new friends. Lots of sweet cuddling, meaningful conversations & genuine human connection lubricated by a few drinks & punctuated by lots of luscious orgasms.

I have started to work on another book, fiction this time & in collaboration with a professional writer. It will likely take a couple years so don’t get too excited yet. I’m passionate about the project & it’s nice to feel that. I won’t say much about it now but I assure you that my fans will find it irresistible.

I’m toying with the idea of working more behind the camera. In the fall I enjoyed running camera & directing a couple of scenes for Samantha Mack. I may work with a local mainstream performer who wants to start creating her own FemDom/fetish content, most likely cuckolding. It would be nice to pass on some of the knowledge I’ve amassed in the last decade. Stay tuned for that collaboration.

Speaking of cuckolding…I am now open to meeting men who are interested in a real life cuckolding relationship.

1. He must live in Vancouver. I am 100% NOT interested in a long distance thing even if there is the potential to move here at some point.

2. He must be financially secure. I am not looking for a client but I’m also not looking for someone who may need my financial support at some point.

3. He must be emotionally mature & a high level communicator.

4. He must LOVE me having sex with other men & women. I prefer he not be with others unless I arrange it. I know, I’m a control freak but there are men who are into this arrangement, I’ve talked to dozens over the years.

5. I must like him, respect him & genuinely enjoy his company. I’m looking for more of a loving cuckold relationship. I don’t mind a little playful verbal humiliation but if he really needs to be degraded or demeaned, I’m not into it.

6. I do not care if he wants to be in chastity or not, if he has a working penis or not, if he wants to be denied orgasms or have them controlled. I don’t care if he’s bisexual or if he does or does not want to suck cock/eat cum. Pussy licking is mandatory though. He must love worshiping pussy & be willing to take instruction to learn how I like it.

7. I don’t particularly care how old he is but for compatibility I think within 10 years of me one way or the other would be best. I’m 42, so I likely won’t have much in common with a 25 year old or a 60 year old. You’re welcome to try to prove me wrong but please don’t waste my time. I am selective.

The ideal candidate would be mid 30’s to mid 40’s, be really into his partner having sex with other men but prefers to be devoted to one woman himself. He should be self aware & able to communicate his feelings as well as empathetic & considerate of others. He needs to have his shit together in life in general.

Note: You would not be involved with filming. You would not be an onscreen cuckold. This would be a personal relationship completely outside of my work.

Sound like you? Send me an email of introduction. I will ask anyone interested to read my book before I’ll meet them. It’s not to jack up book sales as the book was never designed to make me money, but if you read the book you’ll understand why it’s mandatory.

Here’s the link to my book “There Is More To The Story” on Amazon, kindle & paperback: https://www.amazon.ca/There-More-Story-Mistress-T

Email: MsT@MistressT.net (Stop. Before you get excited & send a stupid email with one hand on your dick, think. You won’t get a second chance to make a first impression. I’ve said I’m looking for someone emotionally mature. It’s hard to fake that. You’re not writing to the fantasy character “Mistress T”. You’re writing to the very real life multidimensional human who is looking for a real life relationship that has absolutely nothing to do with her job. If you haven’t read my book yet I strongly recommend you do so before writing me. Don’t worry, I don’t expect very many applicants due to the narrow geographic area of Vancouver only, so there’s no rush.)

xo

Mistress T

Members Site: www.MistressT.net

C4S (Buy vids or just send a TRIBUTE! I love random tributes!): http://www.clips4sale.com/23869

IWantClips: https://iwantclips.com/store/57715/Mistress-T

Manyvids: https://www.manyvids.com/MistressT

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

 

Looking for an apprentice

mistresst_la_mirror_bum

I’ve been in this biz for over a decade & have been successful where many others have not. It seems a shame to hoard all this experience & knowledge.

The hardest part about the biz is getting started. The learning curve is sharp & getting noticed in a sea of competition is problematic.

I can help with those two things. I can help get things set up, she can even use my stuff until she gets her own (camera, lights, editing software, wardrobe, props, sets, film slaves, etc.). I can promote her to my established fan base. That’s key.

Who would be ideal? A mini-me. Someone who looks similar to me, but younger. Probably 25-30, give or take.

She should have raw talent, a gift of the gab, public speaking or acting experience. I pretty much never shut up in my vids. I’m very verbal so if I’m going to promote someone to my fans I think it’s best that she is as similar to me as possible. I know a lot of gals have tried to copy my verbals. So far I haven’t seen anyone do it convincingly well. I can teach some techniques but there has to be raw talent to build on.

She should be in a place in her life to commit to this. I did it full time from the start & put in the hours. This is a full time commitment, but the money will be worth it. After 3-5 years you can work less, but you’ve got to build the business & fan base first.

She must WANT to do this job. It will eat your soul if you only do it for the money. You don’t have to be into every fetish or even any fetish, maybe you just love performing/acting or you get a kick out of making guys do things. Whatever your motivation, it must not be only about money.

She must have her head screwed on straight. I’m looking for a strong, confident, ambitious, independent bad ass bitch. You don’t have to be perfect to be a bad ass bitch who can rock this job. I have struggled with life stuff & mental health issues over the years but I was driven enough to make it look pretty seamless to the outside world. The show must go on. The flexible hours make this a great option for some who struggle with personal issues but you have to be functional enough & self-motivated enough to get what needs to be done, done, on a regular basis.

I think it makes sense to do this training in person (not over cam). I even have a spare room in my house. I have no idea how to ensure I’m fairly compensated for the incredible opportunity I’m offering but I suppose we can cross that bridge if the right candidate presents herself. I’m obviously not offering this for free.

So if you’re reading this & your heart is pounding…you’re looking in the mirror & thinking you could pass for my younger sister, reach out & say hi. Ya never know. MsT@MistressT.net

x

Mistress T

Members Site: www.MistressT.net

C4S (Buy vids or just send a TRIBUTE! I love random tributes!): http://www.clips4sale.com/23869

IWantClips: https://iwantclips.com/store/57715/Mistress-T

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

Hello 2018

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Other possible titles for this blog:

“The Unsuccessful Search for an Assistant”

“I guess this job is harder than I thought?”

“The realities of running a small porn production business”

About 8 months ago I decided to hire an assistant. After doing everything myself for years & seeing some of my peers outsource or have assistance with various aspects of the business I decided to give it a go.

I admit, I was feeling a bit at the end of my rope with email. It is overwhelming & so much of it can be answered with my FAQ but when I tried an auto-responder fans hated it & it created a massive junk mail problem.

The video & photo editing I really enjoy but it’s not the best use of my time. I felt I could benefit from increased tweeting as well as having someone try to put a dent in the colossal amount of stolen content being shared on free sites. The person could also screen my emails, sending the appropriate link with the information if it were one of the usual questions & just sending me the ones that needed my personal attention.

The first person I hired didn’t work out after several months. Although they seemed to be able to do the job tasks well enough after a lot of time invested in training they had miscalculated how busy their lives were. They just didn’t have time to do the job and the work wasn’t getting done on time.

I learned from the first experience and was more careful with the second hire. I painted the worst picture of the job to try to ensure they knew what they were signing up for. The reality is that you’re saturated in sexual & pornographic material. From reading the words in emails to seeing the images while editing pics, vids or looking for pirated content on free sites. The product is porn, the way it would be food in a restaurant or automobiles in a car dealership.

My second hire felt confident this wouldn’t be a problem but they have just capitulated, resigned, sounding traumatized, mentioning having nightmares from it all.

You could chalk it up as their problem, that they shouldn’t have taken the job if they didn’t think they could handle it…but that’s not giving the issue the contemplation it deserves.

Many of you reading this love porn, certainly the porn I produce. The idea of getting paid to work with it, to edit my vids & pics, to tweet about it, to look for it on free sites, might seem highly appealing. I deliberately did not hire someone who was ‘into’ my porn because I thought that would cause other problems, but I didn’t account for how unpleasant it might be for someone who was not into it.

One of my peers has had her content edited by a gay man for years & I’ve spoken to him about it, he just thinks it’s all funny. I made the mistake of assuming that would be the default, that if someone wasn’t turned on by it, that they would just find it funny or not be affected by it. To be fair, the damage was not done by my vids but more by looking for my content on free sharing sites to get removed. Seeing all that other porn too. But I had naively thought that was one of the easier parts of the job. Not so.

So I’m back to doing everything myself. I won’t make the mistake of trying to hire an assistant again. On top of that I’m at the very tail end of finishing my book & planning to embark on new ventures: getting articles published & doing podcasts, new activities that are meant to work in concert with a book launch this year. I have recently moved into a new place for the purpose of having better film sets. Samantha Mack has been a huge help in decorating sets while I was away but there’s still work I need to do. (Check out her vids: https://www.clips4sale.com/studio/36796/mack-movies )

I’m glad that I’m feeling rejuvenated after my trip to Africa in December, I’m going to need all the energy I have, as well as a few more hours in the day if possible. ha ha

I know, 1 crummy pic with some wilder beasts after a month in Africa...I'm sure you feel ripped off. It's what I have at the moment & it's better than nothing.

I know, 1 crummy pic with some wilder beasts after a month in Africa…I’m sure you feel ripped off. It’s what I have at the moment & it’s better than nothing.

Africa was great, by the way. I saw all the animals on safari, zebra’s, elephants, giraffe’s, lions, etc. The hot air balloon ride over the Serengeti was thrilling. I also visited some local tribes & villages, learning about their culture. The last end I enjoyed a few relaxing days at the beach in Zanzibar. Hours reading (The Handmaids Tale by Margaret Atwood), playing chess, making love, walking along the beach at sunset, eating good food & sleeping lots.

So, Happy New Year! 2018 is off with a bang for me, it looks like it’s going to be a busy one.

xo

Mistress T

Members Site: www.MistressT.net

C4S: http://www.clips4sale.com/23869

IWantClips: https://iwantclips.com/store/57715/Mistress-T

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

Canadian Amazon.ca wish list: Click here

I’m still here…just busy.

New digs: more space for film sets!

New digs: more space for film sets!

It’s the Saturday night before Halloween, arguably the biggest party night of the year next to New Year’s. Every year that I can remember I would have been getting all decked out in a costume with friends, having drinks & heading to some big party.

But not this year.

It’s not that I didn’t have options. Weeks ago friends were reminding me to get tickets to the big fetish party or sex club party as they always sell out fast. I was invited to go to Seattle to meet up with some of my fav peers in the industry. I even realized this morning that there’s a fantastic house party just a 26 minute walk from my place, I wouldn’t even need to figure out transportation. It couldn’t be easier.

But I’m not going out. I’m watching a couple episodes of Fargo on Netflix & going to bed early. Hopefully the firecrackers aren’t too bad around here tonight.

When I get that pang of feeling like I’m missing out it’s quickly followed by a feeling of exhaustion & the idea of socializing seems like torture. Not the kind of torture some of you lot like: Tsk tsk.

You see, it’s been a busy time. It IS a busy time. And taking some down time tonight is self care. I probably wouldn’t have done it a few years ago but I’m 41, I’m starting to be nicer to myself & frankly, I don’t have the energy I once did. I bet a lot of you get that, at least those over 35.

So why am I so busy? I recently moved. Everyone knows what that’s like. It all happened kind of fast. My landlord was selling the apartment I’d lived in the last few years & my noisy upstairs neighbor was driving me nuts. I found another place that was really great & I just did it. I did it even though I knew it would be hard. I knew it would be hard because the new place needs a lot of work & I’m about to head out of town on a couple big personal trips. Some of you might know about Africa in December, but I’m also doing a personal trip to Mexico in November. These trips were planned long before I even thought about moving.

Everything is fine. Great really. Just a lot on my plate right now. Some of that has been to prepare to take another break from the biz to work on the book. I find it difficult to write while I have my “Mistress T” hat on so most of my writing has been done while taking work breaks for a month or two. My editor & I have been working away on the book for months but now it’s time for me to dig into her edits, flesh out a few parts & put the finishing touches on it. I’m really hoping that my time in Mexico will be good for that because I really want to get this damn book done!

Good news for fans of my vids. I’ve been busy the last few months filming some fantastic content for you. I was going over the upcoming list today & I’m really excited. Rivers of cum will be produced because of my vids in the coming months. Ha ha.

I’ve been getting my new sets ready so I can start filming when I’m back in January. My pal Samantha Mack is helping to source furniture & textiles, over-seeing the painting, etc. I have a kink expert putting the dungeon together while I’m away with some custom-made kinky creations. *insert evil laughter here*

I’ve also been training a helper/assistant here in Vancouver who will ensure things run smoothly while I’m “away”. I’m never really away, I’ll still be on twitter, dealing with time-sensitive email, maybe blogging if you’re lucky:-)

For long time observant fans you’ll notice the shift in me finally letting other people help me. I did everything myself for so long. Control freak. Hiring experts to do things better than I could, hiring people to do things I could but things that aren’t the best use of my time, accepting the help from friends when it’s offered…all of that. Old dog, new tricks.

Business is great & it inspires me to keep going, to keep making vids my fans love. All of you who support my work by buying my vids make it possible for me to keep doing it. Thank you.

I’ve added some things to my wish list for my new place if you’d like to send a housewarming present: http://a.co/afmffTS

xo

Mistress T

Members Site: www.MistressT.net

C4S: http://www.clips4sale.com/23869

IWantClips: https://iwantclips.com/store/57715/Mistress-T

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

Canadian Amazon.ca wish list: Click here

US Amazon.com wish list: Click here

I jumped out of a perfectly good airplane!

One of my bucket list items in my 40th year was to skydive. I finally got to do it last week, a couple months after my 41st birthday. I went with a couple of my favorite people & it will be a wonderful memory to share.

This pic is not hyper-linked. Find the vid here: https://www.mistresst.net/free_video

This pic is not hyper-linked. Find the vid here: https://www.mistresst.net/free_video

Am I an adrenaline junkie? I don’t know. I went on BIG roller coasters for the first time when I was about 18. I loved it & have been on a lot of those types of rides over the years. I bungee jumped only once in my early 20’s & hated every minute of it until it was over. I loved the rush but never did it again. I’ve white water rafted, jumped off high cliffs & gone very fast as a passenger on motorbikes, all felt too dangerous. If there is a real threat to my life I like it less than the safer thrills like roller coasters. I also loved paragliding & parasailing. So I figured skydiving tandem (attached to a professional) would be good. It would be safe but thrilling.

I was right. Though if he hadn’t shoved us out the door of that plane there is no way I would have gone. I was utterly terrified as he slid me closer to the door. It’s a shame that I had such equipment failure as you can’t really see my reaction which was complete short-circuited terror. It was sensory overload & for a split second I slammed my eyes shut because I could not handle it but realizing I was going to lose my gear if I didn’t grab it kind of brought me back to reality. And reality was hard & fast. It’s amazing, adrenaline. It gives you laser focus. You are not thinking about anything else, you are completely in the moment. To quiet the chatter of the monkey mind even for a minute is so refreshing.

This will be too hippie for some of you but when I heard this a few years ago I wept, it hit home so hard: (If the link doesn’t work just google “Rest in Natural Great Peace”) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gvo-CCtC3Zs

Rest in natural great peace
This exhausted mind
Beaten helplessly by karma and neurotic thought
Like the relentless fury of the pounding waves
In the infinite ocean of samsara.
Rest in natural great peace.

~Nyoshul Khenpo Rinpoche

I’ve heard that meditation practitioners are often adrenaline junkies because it’s a great way to focus the mind, to be present in the moment, which is kind of the goal of meditation.

Anyway, you can find the skydiving vid on the free preview page of my members site (you can stream or download for free from that page): https://www.MistressT.net/free_video

The music & audio are kind of odd as the skydive company edited the vid with copyrighted music so I had to re-edit it with royalty-free music.

Enjoy!

Mistress T

Members Site: www.MistressT.net

C4S: http://www.clips4sale.com/23869

IWantClips: https://iwantclips.com/store/57715/Mistress-T

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

Canadian Amazon.ca wish list: Click here

US Amazon.com wish list: Click here

Aging In The Adult Industry

Mature Domme tip #107: You may not have the energy you had in your younger years. Keep a slave handy to use as a chair for when you need a little rest.

Mature Domme tip #107: You may not have the energy you had in your younger years. Keep a slave handy to use as a chair for when you need a little rest.

My birthday is tomorrow, Apr 29. I’ll be 41. So what’s it like aging in the adult industry?

Unlike the typical porn starlet, I was late to the biz. I started as a private dancer in a strip club when I was 28. The other gals where years younger except one & she didn’t really ‘dance’ for anyone. She had a few regulars who would pay her to sit & drink with them.

I dipped in & out of the adult industry for a few years & was about 32 by the time my fetish video business was full steam ahead. I started referring to myself as a MILF in the early days & added ‘mature’ soon after. The oldest among my peer group they sometimes refer to me as ‘Nana’ (& sometimes Mistress Goofball, but this isn’t a post about how hilarious I am.)

In a lot of survey’s, “MILF” is a very popular search term, often ranking higher than ‘teen’. Here’s some stats: https://www.pornhub.com/insights/2016-year-in-review

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So in a world that in every other way tells you that as a women your value nose dives after 40 (or even after 35), I work in an industry where not only am I highly valued, there’s a lot less competition. I’ve even hammed up the older bit by wearing a grey wig & you’ll often see me in glasses, pearl necklaces, satin blouses or suites. For business, I’m not trying to pretend I’m younger, if anything, the opposite.

Silver fox:-)

Silver fox:-)

How many adult film performers are still in the biz after 40? A helleva lot less than those in their 20’s.

I have received some very generous offers from various big porn production companies who are desperate for MILF’s. I’m not really interested in working with other companies these days but since I find Virtual Reality fascinating you might see a VR fuck scene with me on HologirlsVR this year. My understanding is a key VR sex position requires me to straddle & ride a cock for several minutes & frankly, I’m not sure my knees will take it. ha ha

Yeah, I might need a helper to lift me up & down in this position. Sheesh.

Yeah, I might need a helper to lift me up & down in this position. Sheesh. (Find these scenes on https://www.hologirlsvr.com)

Anyway, back to how I feel about things. I’ll be honest, in the real world I don’t have the same ‘pull’ that I used to. Men don’t quite look at me the same, or look at me at all. Online though, things heat up more each year. Business is booming, sales numbers don’t lie, plus I get loads of messages from men of all ages desiring an older woman.

As if by cruel design though, with each passing year I become more settled, with less inclination to travel, with less energy to work, with less drive to work as hard as I did in the beginning. Finally achieving work-life balance I am no longer married to my work, I have a full & rich life outside of the biz. With an eye to the future I wonder when it will make sense to start to wind down the business. A recent meeting with my financial advisor, he posed the usual questions which were mathematical to him but personal to me: “How much longer do you think you’ll make this income? When will you need to start drawing on your investments? Etc.”

I really don’t know? My heart is still in it but when is the tipping point when I’m no longer a ‘hot MILF’ but I’ve gone ‘past my expiry date’? Of course I want to end on a high note & not drag things out to the point of embarrassment. I know I’m not near that yet but geez, ya know what I mean?

In writing this I did some research on Bettie Page. I thought that she had at one point decided to retire, maybe in her mid 30’s & had never let another photograph be taken of her. That she wanted to be remembered by her fans how she was. Unfortunately my research resulted in a less romantic explanation. She may have actually found religion. So I can’t draw any parallels here about Bettie Page feeling her age, etc. I’ll move on without Ms. Page.

Personally, I love getting older mentally. I wouldn’t want to go back to knowing less, having experienced less. Physically, I don’t think anyone is happy about aging. No one says: “Thank god my skin is starting to wrinkle! I’ve been waiting for this for too long!” The cosmetic industry is booming thanks to people fighting growing old tooth & nail. I’m not convinced there’s such a thing as growing old gracefully & there’s so few women in the public eye doing it naturally that most of us wouldn’t even know what it looks like anymore. I won’t stay on that topic as I know men would prefer to stay blissfully unaware of what women do to look good, while men often consider combing their hair as stepping up their game & trimming their nose hairs as ‘extreme grooming’. Ha ha

The book I’ve been writing is about my life. It’s been amazing working with my editor, going back through & discussing details of various chapters of my story. Seeing how events & experiences shaped who I am. Some pleasant, some not, but it all contributed. I hoped to have the book done in my 40th year & although that didn’t happen, the majority of the work on it happened in my 40th year & it will be done long before my 42nd.

Turning back toward aging in this industry…it’s amazing actually. In the real world as I start to become invisible…as I’m overlooked by more men, I am becoming more desirable to certain fans. Sure, being fetishized for being ‘older’ is somewhat objectifying, like being fetishized for being an Asian woman, a black man, a BBW, etc. but most people tend to be drawn to certain physical traits, I don’t really see anything wrong with that. We like what we like, & for men seeking a mature woman, their options are more limited in porn…& here I am. Experienced, still good lookin’ & not planning to make my exit anytime soon.

Oh…& in case you felt inclined to send me a treat for my birthday, here’s my updated wish lists:

Canadian Amazon.ca wish list: Click here

US Amazon.com wish list: Click here

xo

Mistress T

Members Site: www.MistressT.net

C4S: http://www.clips4sale.com/23869

IWantClips: https://iwantclips.com/store/57715/Mistress-T

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

 

New Tricks?

This post is pretty clean. Bad news for those looking for jerk off material. Good news for those wanting to get to know me more intimately. This is soap from my wish list, sent by a loving fan:-)

This post is pretty clean. Bad news for those looking for jerk off material. Good news for those wanting to get to know me more intimately. This is soap from my wish list, sent by a loving fan:-)

Maybe you can teach an old dog new tricks. The last year I’ve been really into cooking & this post is to thank the fans who have helped. I’ll get to that. A little back story first.

My closest friends are the most shocked to see me in the kitchen. It isn’t that I didn’t know how to cook at all, I could make basic things. I just didn’t cook. You would never catch me hosting a dinner party. My fridge was mostly empty except for booze, mix, ketchup & take out left overs. I’ve always eaten pretty healthy. I rarely had greasy fast food, pizza or junk…I liked sushi, thai food, salads, etc.

I worked from home a lot so I liked to get out of the house for a break & eating out became a convenient habit. It was an opportunity to socialize with friends, go for a walk, combine eating with running errands.

When my partner & I started dating nearly two years ago he wanted to cook for me but was hobbled by my limited kitchen. I added useful things to my wish list like frying pans, a pressure cooker, etc. With these new tools he made me food like nothing I’d ever experienced. It was DELICIOUS, nutritious & vegan. I started watching him cook, then I started to help. I was curious. I wanted to learn how to do it too.

I soon mastered a couple of his signature dishes & got a thrill from adjusting the ingredients here & there to play with the flavors. I would make big pots of soups & freeze individual servings so on busy days I could just pull out a jar & defrost it. My freezer no longer only contained ice cubes!

One of several things in my freezer: a black bean & squash soup with harissa spice.

One of several things in my freezer: a black bean & squash soup with harissa spice.

I wanted to learn more & started searching vegan recipes on the internet. I stumbled across posts from The Thug Kitchen & put their cook book on my wish list. After receiving it & trying some of the recipes I was a woman obsessed! I needed an immersion blender for some things so put it on my wish list. I also added crushed tomatoes, coconut milk, quinoa, brown rice, coconut oil & jars to hold my creations.

I even make my own vegi broth & hot sauce now! I use my own tahini sauce on vegi hash instead of ketchup. I pre-soak & pre-cook dried chickpeas & black beans to use in my recipes. I could go on & on.

I wouldn’t call my food gourmet, but it’s healthy as hell, yummy & comforting. I never thought I would get so excited about cooking & neither would my friends. I even have a mug that says “Domestically Disabled” on it that everyone laughs at.

It has been a team effort & the fans who have sent & continue to send all the helpful things from my wish list are part of that team. I understand some fans would rather buy me lingerie, sexy shoes or luxury items but these practical things send a message that you care about the real, every-day me.

So here’s a few snaps I took while cooking a big pot of lentil soup tonight. Don’t turn up your nose, it’s so full of flavor the last thing you would register is ‘lentils’. I also guarantee you wouldn’t care that there’s no meat in it.

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Tonight’s soup is lentil with a peanut sauce (also includes squash, cauliflower, yam, carrots, onions, crushed tomatoes, garlic, ginger, vegi broth, smoked paprika, cayenne pepper, tamari sauce, a bit of tamarind…I think that’s it. I kind of made this one up & it’s fucking delicious! Peanut butter…who woulda thunk it?!) That’s the immersion blender in my hand & the pressure cooker in the back ground. They both get well used.

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Crushed tomatoes & coconut oil…both from my wish list: thanks!

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This isn’t a very sexy post…so here’s some boobs…along with 2 frying pans from my wish list. They also get well used…just like you’d like to be;-)

If you’re interested in reducing or eliminating animal products from your diet I strongly recommend the Thug Kitchen cook book. There’s lots of curse words which is fun & they really make it easy for those new to cooking. Beyond just following recipes for specific dishes I’ve learned how to feed myself practically in a bunch of different ways.

Eat like you give a fuck. Best fucking cook book ever. Fuck yeah. Lots of curse words:-)

Eat like you give a fuck. Best fucking cook book ever. Fuck yeah. Lots of curse words:-)

Honorable mention goes to my Vega powder, vegan protein powder & basically a multi-vitamin which I have for breakfast every day. I’ve been drinking this for years & love it. It’s on my wish list if you want to send something you know I will super appreciate.

Vega powder & shaker cup sent by a fan from my wish list.

Vega powder & shaker cup sent by a fan from my wish list.

Predictably…I’m going to throw down my wish list link here…because food gets consumed to nourish my Goddess body & it needs to be replenished: http://www.amazon.ca/registry/wishlist/1156JVPYKS1QX/ref=cm_sw_r_tw_ws_x_fFnWybACY6QEW (I know that looks messed up & I should fix it but I’m slipping into a food coma from my yummy dinner…it still works, click it & see…)

xo

Mistress T

Members Site: www.MistressT.net

C4S: http://www.clips4sale.com/23869

IWantClips: https://iwantclips.com/store/57715/Mistress-T

It’s back!  Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

Canadian Amazon.ca wish list: Click here

US Amazon.com wish list: Click here