No shame. my body my choice

Some misguided critter recently tried to shame or insult me by calling me an escort. I would have been more insulted if they had accused me of being the kind of person who would try to shame someone for being an escort.

Over the last 12 years I have been a stripper, a Professional Dominatrix, a cam girl, an escort & fetish model/performer/porn star. I’ve done phone sex, I’ve done my version of a peep show or voyeur show, masturbated for money, done girl-girl shows, sold cuckolding sessions where a guy paid to lick another man’s cum from my pussy, I’ve spat my boyfriends cum into a guy’s mouth for $1000, I’ve had sex for money, I’ve done shows & lap dances at bachelor parties, I’ve done topless poker dealing, topless bartending & sold tequila shooters naked on a clothing optional beach…I’m sure I missed a few things I’ve done for money using my body & sexuality….but you get the idea.

And I’m not ashamed of any of it.

It’s my body, my life, my choices.

I decide from one day to the next what I feel comfortable doing with my body. It has evolved over the years, but I regret nothing & have no hesitation in asserting my boundaries, whatever they are that day.

I do not buy into the BS hierarchy of adult industry workers. Strippers thinking they’re better than escorts because they don’t have sex with their customers, FinDom’s or non-nude fetish models thinking they’re better than those who get naked, phone sex or cam girls thinking they’re better than others for whatever reasons. Sometimes ladies in this industry can be pretty judgey considering how harshly we’re all judged by people in the vanilla world. Some lump us all together & at best they think some kinds of work are at least not ‘as bad’ as others. Even if we’re accepted & supported by our loved ones in our choices, no one prays that their little girl will grow up to be a sex worker & most won’t brag about it. The whole adult industry is stigmatized.

Women have been using their bodies & sexuality to make money for a very long time in a lot of different ways, not just in adult work. Some do it because they want to & they like it, they find it empowering, some do it for money, sometimes both. It does nothing to benefit anyone to try to shame women for it. If most men could do it they would & I doubt they would have any shame about it.

What people choose to do for work does not define who they are or all that they are. Women in the adult industry are also mothers, daughter, sisters, friends, animal lovers, Trekkies, gamers, teachers, foodies, therapists, painters, swimmers, pilots, volunteers, writers, sports fans, musicians, travelers, gamblers, sexual assault survivors, recovering alcoholics..they might be struggling with mental illness, mourning the death of a loved one, be fighting a legal battle with an ex, be caring for an elderly family member, be dealing with PTSD, be studying to get a new job outside of the industry, be working toward a personal goal or be helping someone else to get in or out of the industry…I could go on & on because every woman doing adult work has a story, a unique personality & a life beyond her job.

So, keep this in mind the next time you find yourself or hear someone else judging, objectifying or shaming a person in the adult industry.


Mistress T

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11 thoughts on “No shame.

  1. In honor-shame cultures, shame is associated with the female body. Your life choices have power and the ability to make money because of their contrast with honor/shame values. Deconstructing shame with entrepreneurial values opens a way to the pursuit of happiness not bound to competition with ‘the other.’ Would that others might be so free.
    Thank You, Pat

  2. Mistress T, I cannot judge about you as a person, simply because I dont know you in real. However, I have big respect for the work you doing here and elsewhere in adult industry.
    Your role as Mistress T, belonging to the VERY BEST I know. Your clips gives me tons of pleasure and fun. For that I am very grateful to you!!! Big KISS!!!!
    PS. I guess you have a strong personality that finally can laugh about those sexless people who think they are something better because they go into church at sunday morning.

  3. And definitely no shame about the fabulous trompe l’oeil pantyhose you’re poured into for the above photo, either! 🙂

  4. Hi Mistress T, I am fortunate in that since the onset of my sexuality until now in my late 50s, I have never wanted for the touch of a woman. No great credit to me, just the way things worked out for me. But OMG, if somehow in my 30s I had lost that sweet contact, I would have had a big hole in my life! A few hours with an escort might have saved my sanity!

    When I was young I turned down prearranged sex with a shy woman who was not getting asked out at all, I was not sure I could handle that level of detachment, to function sexually with a woman I had no real feelings for.

    Credit to those who can perform a sexual function for all comers, got to be a hell of a lot harder than it seems at first glance. #thankyouescorts #noshametosharinghotbodies

  5. Very well stated, Mistress. Sexual bigotry is one of those societal shortcomings I don’t think I’ll ever truly understand. It’s like we’re at this weird cultural crossroads where the consumption of sex and pornography has become normalised (as it should be) but the people who sell that sex and produce that pornography (and by ‘people’, I guess I mean women) are still vilified and deemed lesser than.

    I can barely comprehend the staggering swathes of hypocrisy and alarming lack of empathy required to jerk off to a human being with one hand whilst unironically “slut-shaming” them to anyone who’ll listen on the internet with the other. It’s the Madonna-Whore Complex writ large.

    I am glad that you feel no shame in what you do though. It would be both criminal and tragic if you did. You provide a valuable service for men (and no doubt women too) of a certain persuasion, without which we’d be spiritually poorer.

    There’s a certain satisfaction in knowing that if I’m sitting at home at 2am, unable to sleep, and the mood takes me, I’m only a few clicks of a mouse away from watching an elegant woman tease me with her bare feet and dirty socks while she tells me in no uncertain terms what a loser I am; or watching that same woman assert her dominance over a lucky submissive as she slaps his face and busts his balls as her attractive friend watches and giggles.

    That you, and women like you, allow people like me to scratch that itch for a small fee, is one of the great advertisements for the internet’s continued existence. Shame is the last thing that should be bestowed upon you.

  6. everyone has kinky ideas … you have the guts to experience them ..
    those that would shame you are cowards for denying themselves
    the fantasies that have haunted them for years

    i look up to and respect you
    as one that is lucky enough to live out my fantasies with my girlfriend..
    and if i’m ever in canada in your area .. one of my fantasies would be
    to take you out for a nice dinner ..i love your work

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