Since my blog entry talking about C and I starting the business together I’ve had some questions about our relationship and roles in the business. I can move the story along and answer those questions at the same time.

We started the clips store and then the members site. C performed in some of the vids. He is the only male performer I had intercourse with in my vids. He is the only male in all of the shoejob vids. C also ran the camera for all of the scenes. He taught me to edit video early on and I enjoyed it so much I did the majority of my own editing. With my background in sales, marketing and business I did everything else. I answered all of the emails, did all of the advertising, decided on the themes & scenes, etc.

It has always been a female owned & operated business even though C was by my side and involved.

The tricky thing about a ‘tell-all’ story is not violating the privacy of those who are a part of the story. C has requested that I don’t write about our break up and I’ll respect that. I will simply say that it was my choice to end our personal relationship which meant an end to our business relationship as well.

There was a time, not long ago when I moved into a new place, alone, bought a new video camera, lighting and started a new chapter running the business solo. It was a difficult time on many levels. For example, I have always been intimidated by new technology and I was nervous about learning how to use the new camera. It sat in the box for weeks before I even tried to use it. Eventually I began and of course it was fine.

I used to film some of my solo vids with the camera on the tripod and some with C holding the camera. There are pro’s & con’s to both and now that I only film with the camera on the tripod, alone, I feel it’s more intimate. It’s just me and the guy (who I imagine) watching me, jerking off to me. I feel like I can go deeper into the head space of that fetish and moment. I love the vids I’ve been creating on my own.

Of course I can not grow a penis and fuck myself so I will probably need to find new ‘talent’ for the cuckold vids and other vids where I have intercourse. There is only so much one person can do on their own *smile*.

The future looks brighter than ever. In some ways I feel like I’ve lost something that was holding me back. I have started to explore new opportunities and as life often goes, new opportunities are falling in my lap. My step father always says of my great luck: “Luck is when opportunity meets preparation.”

"Your actions, and your action alone, determines your worth."~ Evelyn Waugh