Relaxing in Phoenix…

I write this from sunny Phoenix in a comfortable apartment I rented for a couple of weeks. I’ll soon head out to the Jacuzzi & maybe take a swim in the heated pool. Not sure it’s hot enough for that today, we’ll see.

I can relax...see! :-)

I can relax…see! 🙂

I’ve only been in Phoenix for a couple of days & I haven’t seen much yet. After moving around so much (7 places in 2 weeks!) I was ready to just chill, read, make love in the middle of the day, eat at home & sleep. I’m reading “Sex At Dawn” in case you’re interested…& I’ve been watching “Blacklist” on Netflix.

It was quite an action-packed 2 weeks. Lots of visits with friends, lots of beautiful terrain, discovering new places, etc. I filmed some fantastic content in Vegas with Slave Wade, who Lexi Sindel graciously loaned to me. Sharing is caring!

Poor Slave Wade....so hard to hold off cumming with Lexi's & my feet taunting him...

Poor Slave Wade….so hard to hold off cumming with Lexi’s & my feet taunting him…

I almost had a session in Vegas but that didn’t work out at planned. I only accept the occasional generous booking these days & I always require a deposit. Any Pro Domme will tell you that guys who book sessions often flake out, cancel, chicken out, etc. It’s just part of the business. Even when they make a deposit they’ll often jam out but it does make those incidents less irritating.

So I accepted a booking with a deposit & arrived at the clients hotel early to enjoy the spa & to have a snack with my boyfriend in the cafe. A half an hour before the session the client emailed to say that he was so nervous he’d given himself an upset tummy so needed to cancel. I told him that he should at least come say hello & not miss the opportunity to meet me. He said he was on his way down.

I waited. I finished my food & paid. He hadn’t shown up. I emailed to say I was leaving & he said he was just too nervous to meet me. As I was leaving I saw a shifty guy looking at me funny. I paused long enough to give him a chance to say hello. He didn’t. I figured it was him but what was I to do? I walked away as he was emailing me to please come back & give him another chance. I didn’t but he sent more money for wasting my time.

What do you think about that?

Here’s a blast from the past. When I was a newbie Domme (nearly a decade ago) I used to go to cities like Calgary & do these crazy marathon work days. Holed up in a basic 3 star hotel room for a few days seeing 6-9 clients a day (1-2 hour sessions). I had a limited offering & hotel rooms were not equipped like dungeons so my sessions were often similar. Tying guys to beds or chairs, CBT/NT, sensory deprivation, golden showers, foot/boot worship and a whole lot of strap-on. I used to get reviewed on a popular review site & after one of these trips 3 different guys gave almost identical reviews. Oops. *smile*

Mistress T strap-on circa 2007

I did a whole lotta strap-on in my early days…

Those days are behind me. No more assembly line sessions. I take them when I’m in the mood, when I think I’ll enjoy someone & when the money is compelling enough. I confess, I get a rush out of being offered a lot of money for a little of my time & attention. Maybe there’s a bit of a Financial Domme in me after all?

So here I am in Phoenix, trying to set up filming in the next couple of weeks. I know I can only relax for so long before getting antsy. I thrive on being productive and I want to film. My happy place is in front of the camera. I have a couple of guys lined up this week but I don’t count my chickens until their hatched. I haven’t had as many applicants as I would have liked. Not yet anyway. Frankly, I’m surprised…although it seems that the more famous I become the more intimidated guys get. The nervous Vegas guy isn’t the first one to chicken out like that.

I’m just a nice, normal person in real life. I’m really fun to film with, nothing to be scared of.

Okay, maybe be a little scared:-)

Okay, maybe be a little scared:-)

After Phoenix we’re heading to Joshua Tree & Palm Springs for about 10 days then doing a faster road trip back up to Vancouver. Probably not stopping long enough anywhere on the way home to see anyone, but it’s a road trip after all, which allows more flexibility.

In other news, I’ve revived my Tumblr account & will start posting more on there…if you’re into that sort of thing? https://www.tumblr.com/blog/mistress-t-fetish

Best,
Mistress T

Members site: http://www.MistressT.net
PPV: http://www.clips4sale.com/23869
Blog: http://www.MistressT.net/blog/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

Did I anticipate the perceptions?

How am I perceived?

How am I perceived?

I was lovingly asked recently: “How did you expect to be perceived by people before you got into this business?”. He asked the question because I often mention my frustration with stigma & judgement. How there are times when I lie about what I do to avoid that judgement, etc.

I thought about it for a moment before responding with the cliche statements of: “I didn’t really choose this work, it kind of chose me, so there wasn’t a lot of advance thought about other people’s perceptions.” Which is only partly true because my path to this work was not a straight line.

I first chose to moonlight from my vanilla job & sell tequila shooters naked on a hippie beach. I was not judged there, I was celebrated, supported & loved.

I was comfortable in my own skin...on a nude beach I felt at home.

I was comfortable in my own skin…on a nude beach I felt at home.

I then chose to try stripping but I was certainly aware of the stigmas attached to that profession. I wore a disguise, kept it secret & only did it briefly before going back to vanilla work again. I loved being a private dancer in a strip club. I did no-contact private dancing (so not lap dancing) & my sales experience helped me to be an effective hustler, selling guys dances. It was profitable & I was good at it but I felt like I was “too good” for it. Even I judged me!

I eventually went back to stripping after being miserable in my vanilla job. That led to creating my version of a voyeur show or peep show at home. Guys would come over & pay me to masturbate & talk dirty while they jerked off sitting on a chair by the bed, no touching allowed.

I loved the exhibitionism, the naughtiness & of course, the money. But I didn’t like the stigma. There wasn’t much difference between what I was doing & full-on escorting. I just wasn’t actually having intercourse or oral/manual sex…but it was similar enough I didn’t tell just anyone & when I did I was careful to make the distinction between what I was doing & “full service” prostitution. I magnified that fine line.

So during those career decisions, yes, I was fully aware of what people’s perception would be. But I was running from misery working in the vanilla world, office politics, the soul-sucking or mind-numbing reality of working for boring or stupid people & climbing the corporate ladder. I was a corporate whore in the vanilla world.

Climbing the corporate ladder was a soul-sucking experience for me.

Then Pro Domme work found me. I didn’t set out to be a Dominatrix. Certain clients saw it in me & requested kink & fetish activities. I indulged & eventually I started to get positively reviewed on forums as a Dominatrix & I grew into the role. Video work found me soon after. The rest is history. (That’s the Readers Digest version for this blog post, if you’ve read my blog from the beginning you know the long version of the story.)

In the beginning...I hid my face in my ads.

In the beginning…I hid my face in my ads.

If I had a thought in the early days it was that being a Dominatrix was more respectable than being a stripper or prostitute. It was cooler, intimidating , edgier. I felt bad ass. Nearly 10 years later I laugh at the “baby Domme” version of me. I have seen this ego trip many times with new Dommes. Every day I see different women in the adult business snubbing their nose at women who do different types of adult work. I’ve heard:

“I only do cam work, so I’m better than those dirty sluts who actually meet & touch those gross guys.”

and/or:

“I’m a REAL Dominatrix who does real time sessions so I’m better than those fake girls who only do cam.”

I could go on & on, cam girls snub porn girls, escorts snub Dominatrix’s, stage dancers snub private dancers, phone sex girls snub cam girls, rub n’ tug girls snub escorts, Pro Dommes who don’t get naked snub those who do, etc. There’s a lot of support & camaraderie in the adult industry but there’s a fair share of cattiness too. A certain amount of stigma & judgement within our own industry!

I love what I do. Truly. Although I feel like this work found me I did make many small & big decisions before & since to put me on & keep me on this path. I haven’t loved the stigma. I’ve been evicted once (before I understood what my rights are) & had neighbors in another place attempt to get me evicted. I’ve had guys choose to not get into a relationship with me because of what I do. There’s certainly been a fair bit of whispering & gossip behind my back.

mindblowing_handjob2

I have a lot of fun “at work”.

At the end of the day we live our lives for ourselves. We make decisions that serve us. If you try to please other people all the time you will fail.

All jobs have good & bad. I happen to have a job that I truly love but other people sometimes judge me for doing. A lot of people with “respectable” jobs hate going to work every day.  If I could go back 15 years & tell my younger self working in vanilla jobs I hated anything it would be to fearlessly go in the direction that instinctively felt right for me & ignore other people’s opinions.

That’s that advice I give myself every day now.

Cheers,

Mistress T

Members site: http://www.MistressT.net
PPV: http://www.clips4sale.com/23869
Blog: http://www.MistressT.net/blog/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

 

 

Seattle & Oregon!

Road trip!

Road trip!

I have spontaneously decided to drive down to Oregon this coming weekend for an event. As I’m passing through Seattle (or beyond) I may be motivated to stop & meet 1 or 2 lucky fans. (On the way down & back).

So, what’s possible? Based on the unique & mostly personal nature of this trip there are limits but here’s some ideas:

1. Public meeting: Just want to meet me, share a meal, buy some used panties right off of me? Sure! (Minimum $300).

Fresh & moist!

Fresh & moist!

2. In a hotel room or your place: tie & tease/hand release, foot worship, clothed face sitting, golden showers, humiliation, a variety of role-plays. (Minimum $400 but considering there will likely only be time for 1 lucky guy, he who is the most generous will win this opportunity.)

That could be your cock...

That could be your cock…

3. Cuckolding: yup. For real. I’ll be traveling with my fella. He’s bi & a cream pie is possible. This is also available in Vancouver now! (Minimum $500, but as above, chances are he who offers the most will get this opportunity.)

Cuckolding, up close & personal.

Cuckolding, up close & personal.

I will not be bringing any props or working in a dungeon so no corporal, no fancy bondage, no strap-on, no fetish attire dependent scenes…as usual, no hard sports, no intercourse or oral sex (unless forced bi cock sucking or cream pie clean up.)

If there’s something you’d like that I haven’t listed but you think might work without props or a dungeon, feel free to ask!

To separate the very keen fans from the not-as-serious tire-kickers I’m implementing the “tribute to apply” rule I recently used for my UK trip, which worked out beautifully.

Ways to pay $50 tribute (yes, you must tribute to apply to see me, but 1 option is to join my site, which I would expect from most fans anyway):

-Tribute button on my clips store: http://www.clips4sale.com/23869 (Clip cash card should work even if you don’t have a credit card)
-$50 worth of vids from my clips store: http://www.clips4sale.com/23869
-Get a premium membership to my site: http://www.MistressT.net
-$50 gift card from Amazon.com (sent to email address below)
-$50 worth of gifts from my Amazon wish list: http://www.amazon.com/registry/wishlist
If you only have PayPal this will work:
-$50 micro-loan through Kiva: http://www.mistresst.net/blog/uncategorized/loan-to-a-worthwile-cause-get-free-porn/

Or a gift card for my favorite spa (paypal):

http://www.mirajhammam.com/gift-certificates/

HOW TO APPLY:

Send an email to MsT@MistressT.net:

#1. With proof of the tribute.

#2. Introducing yourself & your interests. Include references if you have them.

Best,
Mistress T

Members site: http://www.MistressT.net
PPV: http://www.clips4sale.com/23869
Blog: http://www.MistressT.net/blog/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

Do I remind you of anyone?

Mistress T in heels and mini skirt.

Girl next door?

Over the years I’ve had a lot of guys tell me that I remind them of someone from their real lives. I’m not sure how common this is for sex workers/Pro Dommes/escorts, etc.?

Often it’s an ex girlfriend or a love interest from their past. There is an element of nostalgia in these encounters. They sometimes fantasize that they are reuniting with a grown up version of a teenage love from 20 years ago or so. In one situation I was able to help a guy work through some issues he had had over a relationship that didn’t end well. By playing the role of this woman I could give a different perspective of events, how she may have felt, etc.

I’ve had at least a couple of guys say that I look similar to their current wives. One fella liked to be cuckolded by me & imagine that I was his wife. He wanted so badly to see his wife fuck other men but she wasn’t into it. He lived out those fantasies with me.

Imagine I'm your wife...getting fucked by another man...

Imagine I’m your wife…getting fucked by another man…

I’ve had guys say that I remind them of their aunt, mom or mothers friend. Someone they had a crush on when they were younger. Sometimes a school teacher or someone in an authoritative position. We role play fantasies that would have been too taboo to play out otherwise.

Mistress T in a business suit.

Did you do your homework???

Men are very visual & I understand they often like a certain ‘look’. I’ve kept basically the same hair style & haven’t gotten tattoos & piercings like a lot of my friends. Partly because of my job, for those who fantasize I’m a 1940’s pin-up model or Hollywood actress. Or to make it easier for those who are pretending I’m someone else. I don’t mind though. I like my look.

I find it fascinating that men can imagine that I am someone else, someone who meant or means something special to them. That I can help them fulfill fantasies or work through unresolved issues. This is one of the more interesting parts of my work.

Do I remind you of someone? Or are you a woman in a similar line of work who gets told by a lot of men that you remind them of someone? Feel free to share in the comments!

Best,
Mistress T

Members site: http://www.MistressT.net
PPV: http://www.clips4sale.com/23869
Blog: http://www.MistressT.net/blog/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

 

 

The ups & ‘downs’ of filming with civilians

"Is that thing going to get hard?"

“Is that thing going to get hard?”

I have a lot of interesting stories about filming with fans, friends & regular folks. In case you didn’t know already: I don’t hire professional performers. I live in Vancouver, not LA, there aren’t even pro’s here to hire (that I know of).

Each guy has his own story, interests, quirks, etc. Some guys I end up filming with on a regular basis & they’re great. I like the authenticity I get from filming with civilians. Sometimes they kind of flop on the first go. This is one of those stories.

He applied like any other. He sounded good, his pics showed a decent enough figure & a big enough cock…although it was not fully erect. Sometimes it’s hard for guys to take good selfies, so I didn’t think much of it at the time.

He was visiting from another city. I suggested we go for dinner to get acquainted. Over dinner he spoke in length about another Mistress he had been seeing whom he was overly infatuated with. It seems he felt they were at a cross roads where clearer boundaries needed to be defined or they needed to take the relationship in a more personal direction. It sounded like he would only really be satisfied with a more personal direction.

*Insert groan here*

I hate situations like this. I’ve been there with clients & most of the Pro Dommes I know have been there too, in one way or another. Sometimes lines get blurry. If you’ve sessioned hours & hours with a regular client & you genuinely enjoy it & like them…the client can start to feel like the relationship is more personal than professional. They can start to resent paying by the hour. Sometimes clients & Dommes end up in real-life romantic relationships if the feelings are mutual. Rules get bent or broken. It can cause confusion.

I inserted that *groan* because I haven’t a clue what this guy’s Mistress is feeling. I have no idea if he’s a delusional & obsessed or if she has led him on maliciously…or if she is in love with him…I-have-no-idea. So it’s tricky for me to play the therapist when I have no idea what I’m really dealing with…and he very much wanted my advice & opinions. Awkward.

So we try to film a scene after dinner  (and after talking about his dilemma for a couple of hours). No surprise: he can’t get an erection. Not even a flinch. It is the softest penis I think I have ever felt. After a little while I ask if he thinks this is going to work…he suggests maybe if he tries himself to get it hard it might work. Sexy as hell, right? I ask if he’d like me to leave: he says yes!

So I find myself sitting in the next room while this guy is wanking himself thinking: it’s lucky I have a strong sense of self worth or it might be a bit of a blow to the ol’ ego to be asked to leave so a guy can get his dick hard. All hail Mistress T: erection destroyer!

I few minutes later I hear a weak “I think it’s hard!” & I pop my head in to see a quickly disappearing micro erection. Like a real erection but much softer.

I called it a wrap. He paid me well as an apology for wasting my time, confessing the whole thing was just an attempt to distract himself from the other Mistress.

And so it goes. Ya win some, you lose some. Fortunately I win way more often *smile*.

Best,
Mistress T

Members site: http://www.MistressT.net
PPV: http://www.clips4sale.com/23869
Blog: http://www.MistressT.net/blog/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/MistressTdotnet

Oral sex?

MistressT fetish goddess asslicking ass worship

I know you want to be him, but cool your engines & read this before emailing me begging to lick me…

I get a lot of emails from guys wanting to lick my ass and/or pussy. So I decided to make a blog post on the topic so I can just email this link rather than explaining over & over.

If you’re not a reader, the short answer is: “No”. But if you’re interested in more info please read on…

If you know my story from the beginning you’ll know that I started out doing no-contact voyeur shows/masturbation shows where the guy could jerk himself off while watching me…because although I was excited by being an exhibitionist & enjoyed naughty play I wasn’t comfortable actually having sex in that situation. I didn’t like the idea of feeling obligated to have sex with a guy just because he had paid me. From voyeur shows I transitioned to Pro Domme work & I followed the so-called traditional rules of Professional Domination (no intercourse, no oral sex, no hand jobs) & that was fine but they weren’t MY rules and over time I adjusted the rules to suit me (occasionally requiring oral service from regular clients I felt comfortable with, for example.) I even ended up in a long term relationship with someone who started out as a client.

At one point I decided that I couldn’t be sure ‘escort work’ wasn’t for me unless I tried it so I gave it a go & after about a half dozen clients my curiosity was satisfied. I simply do not enjoy being in a situation where I am obligated to have intercourse or oral sex with someone because they have paid me…when it’s my job to provide that service. All sex work is providing a service to a certain extent, even traditional Pro Domme work (you are exchanging a service for money). I am naturally Dominant & a control freak. There are limits to how “service-oriented” I can be before I hit a wall.

Hand jobs tho? I love giving hand jobs & I have no issue with that. But that’s my hand vs. my vagina, so that’s understandable. It’s certainly a lot more intimate for someone to touch my vagina or anus than my HAND touching them.

I know some people see my vids and get the impression that I do everything with anyone. BUT the men I’m intimate with in my vids are men that I am very familiar with. Often they are my own personal lovers. Sometimes friends or clients I’ve had for years. Sometimes they are slaves that have served one of my fellow Dommes for a long time, making them more comfortable to be with.

If you’re reading this & trying to figure out how you can get between my legs…it’s not impossible but it’s unlikely if that is your only selfish goal. You can pay for my time in private to get acquainted or if you have value as a film slave, you can apply…but don’t try to date me. I’m running a business. Respect that. Sure, I have been in a relationship with someone who started as a client (although that was 1 out of hundreds, so the odds aren’t in your favor)…but I have NEVER gone on a date (with no compensation) with someone who has started as a fan of Mistress T. Guys looking for free play greatly offend me.

So to recap:

– I don’t offer “escort” type sessions (intercourse or oral sex for pay). That means no oral worship, no direct contact between your mouth, hands or penis & my vagina or anus. By the way, prostitution is legal where I live so this is not a legal disclaimer, it’s real.

– Hand jobs are fine (along with strap-on, role-play, humiliation, foot worship, golden showers, ballbusting, spanking, sissy play/X-dressing & a few other things.)

– My social rate is $100/hour & I LOVE meeting fans! We can go for lunch or dinner…a walk, shopping, to the theater, parties, whatever. I’m a social chameleon.

– My private session rates vary depending on details but nothing in private happens for less than $300 the first time. I am very selective about who I see in private & rarely accept sessions these days. I’m pretty busy creating all the amazing content you love to jerk off to! I do need to eat though so you’re welcome to take me for a meal (at $100/hr social rate) & discuss the possibility of a private session.

Best,
Mistress T

Members site: http://www.MistressT.net
PPV: http://www.clips4sale.com/23869
Blog: http://www.MistressT.net/blog/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/MistressTdotnet