Shortly after San Fran & things ending with the judgmental boyfriend another life-changing event happened.
At that time I was proud of myself for landing a prestigious outside sales job. I had purposefully only taken inside sales jobs for years, doing my thing on the phone so that no one could say that I got by on my looks. Having had a lot of success just using my brain & my voice I decided it was time to use the rest of my assets. I leased a brand new car. I wore business suits. I took pics of myself in my business suit next to my brand new car and sent them to my Mother. I wanted her to be proud of me.
Friends took me to Wreck beach one day. It was a clothing optional beach and I had no problem gearing right down. It felt amazing to be nude outside, with the ocean breeze caressing my skin. A cute, blond surfer boy came along selling drinks. There was just something about him. His tanned skin, his disheveled sun bleached hair, his sparkling blue eyes and relaxed manner. I had to get to know him better.
I came back to the beach and pursued him. We had a hot fling and as I got to know him I was fascinated with his free spirit way of living. Early 30’s, hanging out at the beach making a simple living, partying a lot, traveling to exotic places in the winter for months at a time…he was the happiest person I ever met and it came through in the way he fucked. So present in the moment. So passionate.
He encouraged me to come down to the beach after work and sell tequila shooters at sunset for fun and extra cash. It seemed to be a crazy idea, selling tequila shooters nude, on a nude beach? Crazy was just what I needed. That summer there was a song that kept playing on the radio with a line that haunted me, “I think my life is passing me by…” Here’s a link to the vid/song: http://www.musictory.com/music/Sam+Roberts/Brother+Down
Summer was coming to an end and all I would have was a job that I actually hated. A job I was doing because I thought it would make my Mother proud. Even though, bless her, she always just said she wanted me to be happy. She also said that I was too entrepreneurial to ever be satisfied working for someone else.
I decided that I would go to India. I didn’t have much money saved but I would have just charged it on my credit card. A girlfriend invited me to go to Japan with her to make quick cash hostessing with her for a few months. She had done it before. It was long hours but easy, just pouring drinks, singing karaoke and making conversation. No sex, no stripping, no funny business. That was all true except it wasn’t easy. At least not for me. I felt like a slave. Management was very strict. It was a hard 3 months but it was an adventure and then I went to Thailand for a month and India for 2 months. Alone!
I could expand on what happened in those 6 months of travel. I have a lot of stories. But this isn’t a travel blog and I have a feeling that my readers are more interested in hearing how all this contributed to me becoming ‘Mistress T’. It started with meeting that beach boy who taught me that there are other ways to make a living and better ways to live your life other than just climbing the corporate ladder and conforming to other people’s rules. He taught me that it’s important to be true to yourself and to not care what people thought. Making a major life shift doesn’t happen over night. I rebounded back into the corporate world a couple more times before I left it for good. That beach boy has always been in my life, still is, to remind me to be true to myself.
The summer I returned from India was the best summer of my life. I sold tequila shooters every day at the beach. I partied a lot. I had 3 wonderful lovers on rotation. I slept with who I wanted when I wanted and there was no drama. I started attending fetish parties in Vancouver. I began to move in the direction of incorporating my sexual kinky side with my entrepreneurial side. I started to get braver, more confident, more self aware. A fire had been lite and it started to burn hotter, pushing me in the direction of becoming ‘Mistress T’.
Your posts are helpful. I’m coming to many of the same conclusions much later in life, but the effect is the same. Things are changing – sometimes two steps forwad, one step back – irrevocably for a different way of living.
Share some of the details of the adjustments you made. So far, you’ve written mostly of the prompts and opportunities, but eventually you made concious decision to move your life in a different directlon (3 months in Japan, for instance). If you are to prepare others to do likewise, it is these details that will arm us for the challenges ahead.
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