Update and stuff

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It’s been a year since my last blog post. And what a year it has been.

For the casual observer, things probably look fine. For the careful observer, you likely know that things have been very different for me during the pandemic. I have not been seeing fans in person for sessions or filming. I have changed my business model to focus mostly on my fan page: https://www.loyalfans.com/Mistress-T

That has been amazing for the fans who have used it but it’s not for everyone, I suppose. It’s also more about giving a lot of attention to fewer fans for a profit, rather than giving free attention to many more fans (like twitter).

But anyway. How ya been? Alright? Been a bit rough?

I turned 45 in April and didn’t make a big announcement about it but received some lovely gifts and tributes from fans. Much appreciated. Gift cards for Etsy helped me pick up a few new things for my summer wardrobe while supporting small business owners.

From October 2020 until early summer I focused on writing my 2nd book. A fiction. It was tremendously good for my mental health to have a creative project to focus on. I would often walk solo in the woods trying to work out some snag in the story line or some pickle the main character got herself into. I had three people read it and give feedback. I made changes and it is now in the hands of a very good, but busy editor. When she’s done I will present it to some publishers. I had been advised to seek a literary agent but upon more research that may not be the right strategy, though I’m still open to it. I wrote the book to be easily adapted to a screen play for a movie or TV series. Ideally I would find a literary agent that does all of that and so far I’ve only found agents that don’t work with screenplays. It’s all a learning experience and I welcome any advice from those in the know.

I’ve been double vaccinated so have been able to relax a bit, especially with case numbers being lower where I am…but with the Delta variant and numbers going back up I am unsure what the future holds? So no travel plans to see fans at this time and not really seeing fans locally either. Financially I don’t need to. I realize many “service providers” need to meet fans in person to make a living but since that’s not the case for me it’s hard to justify the potential risk. I have made a couple of exceptions for dinner dates with vaccinated fans and may continue to do that. If there is a chance of meeting me, you being vaccinated is a non-negotiable.

We’re all bloody tired of talking about the pandemic, aren’t we?

So I’m still here. I’m trying to enjoy life. Spending more time in rivers this summer with a few good friends. I have had a couple of new lovers which has been…lovely. I’ve been doing a bit of gardening, riding my bicycle around, hanging out with my pet Lovebird. Things are good for me.

I’m not as active as I once was but who could keep up that pace for so many years? I created over 2000 vids. It’s time to slow down and enjoy life. I know that’s not good news for those who want me to keep churning out content or for those desperate to session with me in person…but hopefully for those who see me more as a human than just a content creator or service provider, you’ll smile knowing that I’m putting self care before the job.

There’s lots of women out there who very much want to see you and want your business. I know, I’m special, but for what you need I’m not the only one. So save your begging. If you have a nearly unlimited budget and respectful demeanor, sure, message me. Maybe, when it’s safe we can meet. But if you’re just looking for a regular session at a reasonable rate, you’ll need to look elsewhere.

That’s my little update for now. I have no idea when the new book will be available as I’m not planning to self publish this one, the time line is out of my control. I’ll make announcements here, twitter and on my fan page.

Keep on keeping on my darlings.

xo

Mistress T

 

A new “Fan Page”!

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I finally gave in and started a “fan page”. I’m not great with new technology. I’ve been doing things pretty much the same way for over a decade. Pay-per-view clips stores, members site, twitter.

I found these new platforms intimidating. At one point I even tried to start an OnlyFans but I ran into technical problems and their customer service department took several days to respond. Their solution didn’t work and it took them another several days to respond again. It still didn’t fix the problem so I gave up.

Then the owners of LoyalFans reached out to me. They assured me they’d give me top notch customer service, and they have. It’s a new platform and some things are still developing (getting better) but I couldn’t be more pleased with the experience. It’s been a lot of fun!

So after trying it out for about 10 days I am ready to invite you to join me there. Take the plunge. It’s free for followers, so sort of like following me on twitter but better. I’d prefer you subscribe, it’s only $10 a month. Of course that’s just to get you in the door so I can get more money out of you, hey, just being honest! You can send tips (because you get a hellava lot for $10!), which are appreciated and we can private message which is on a whole other level. You probably couldn’t handle it, ha ha.

On LoyalFans I can be creative with audio recordings/voice messages (my favorite). Of course there’s lots of pics and vids. Mostly stuff I create with my iphone. If you prefer the professional full length vids I’ve traditionally made the place for that is still on my members site or clips stores. LoyalFans is a more intimate and interactive kind of experience.

Check it out. If you’re intimidated by new technology, fear not. It only hurts for a minute. It’s easy and fun to use.

Here’s the link: https://www.loyalfans.com/Mistress-T 

For those needing to keep their billing extra discreet, I think they’ll have PayPal as an option eventually. In the mean time, become a follower. Email me to inquire about other ways to pay me: MsT@MisressT.net

xo

Mistress T

Members Site: www.MistressT.net

C4S (Buy vids or just send a TRIBUTE! I love random tributes!): http://www.clips4sale.com/23869

IWantClips: https://iwantclips.com/store/57715/Mistress-T

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

Sneak peeks:

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Becoming a Better Man

I recently received an email from a 21 year old fella who asked for my guidance in becoming a better man. He said he didn’t have positive male role models & believed the tutelage of a strong woman would benefit him.

The skeptical might view this as a trick to get me to role play a fantasy with him, not to actually obtain helpful info to improve his real life…& as it turns out, you’d be right. After tweeting asking my fans for suggestions to help younger men seeking to become better humans the ungrateful rascal told me off for not taking him on as a personal slave. (I’m not accepting new slaves at the moment but he didn’t take the perceived rejection gracefully.)

No matter! I think the advice my fans provided was fantastic & I’m sure there are younger men reading this who would benefit so I’ve listed some of the reading suggestions along with youtube stuff that might be helpful. I haven’t read everything on this list but at a glance they seem to have value & positive reviews.

I’ll also share a few bits of advice I personally think is helpful for younger people:

– You have 2 ears & 1 mouth. That means it’s better to listen at least twice as much as you speak. Practice the art of active listening. Not only will you learn more but you’ll make better connections with those who love to feel heard (that would be everyone).

– To thine own self be true. Be honest with yourself about how you really feel about stuff. You can manage or control your behavior but your feelings are a different story. Learn to accept the full spectrum of your feelings: sadness, fear, anger, frustration, joy, love, excitement, nervousness, anxiety, lust, impatience, numbness, relief, gratitude, vulnerability, etc. Feel the feeling in your body, witness it, ask yourself what message the feeling brings or is there another root to the feeling (like the root of anger might be hurt or sadness or a feeling of being excluded, etc.) Accept the feeling with warm curiosity and non-judgement. Let the feeling pass when it’s ready. Don’t wallow in it but don’t rush it through or stuff it down wishing you felt differently.

– Cultivate empathy by trying to understand things from the other persons perspective. Your feelings matter but the world doesn’t revolve around you. Find the balance of empathy for yourself AND others.

– Have integrity. If you say you’ll do something, do it. Keep your word. Be reliable. Take the high road.

– Be kind for the sake of being kind. Don’t always expect an immediate reward for doing something nice for someone. Learn to enjoy the feeling of just doing something good or doing the right thing.

– Be grateful for what you do have. There is always something to be grateful for no matter how bad things get. “I cried because I had no shoes, then I met a man who had no feet.” – Mahatma Gandhi

– If having good sex with women in real life is important to you choose the porn you view carefully. Seek out porn with regular people having real sex/women having real orgasms. Most porn is entertainment, not education. Sex in real life is not like most porn which tends to lack intimacy, genuine connection, high-level communication, authentic female orgasms & realistic pacing with warm up. Try searching “ethical porn” or “feminist porn”.

Google search example: https://www.bustle.com/p/8-places-to-watch-ethical-porn-that-focuses-on-female-pleasure-according-to-a-feminist-pornographer-9108930

There’s a lot more I could say but I understand attention spans are short. Do your own research to find what resonates with you! There’s loads of stuff on youtube & plenty of great podcasts, TedTalks, etc. The internet is full of helpful stuff to improve yourself. If having a good therapist is accessible to you either through work/an employee assistance program or if you can afford one, there’s hardly anyone that can’t benefit from therapy. Seek good friendships with men & women of different ages. Be there for them, build your own community to learn from each other. Learn to care about others feelings & how to share your feelings in a way that connects you with others authentically. Lastly, be kind to yourself. Be the best friend, parent, cheerleader, confidant to yourself you could ever want or need. Self care, yo.

Reading suggestions:

The Tao of Pooh & The Te of Piglet by Benjamin Hoff

Audiobook for the Tao of Pooh: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ksVgOSJ_Kv0

 

Models: Attract Women Through Honesty by Mark Manson

Top 5 lessons from “Attract Women Through Honesty”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hs0d7Da8ufo

 

Way of the Peaceful Warrior and its sequel by Dan Millman

Dan Millman’s TedTalk: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MDL85fzdc1g

 

The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho

 

The Four Agreements by Miguel Ruiz with Janet Mills

Helpful vid on The Four Agreements on youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HElfaDPwZ6c

 

Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl

Audiobook for “Man’s Search for Meaning” on youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zF65lvwQPbw

 

Ishmael- Daniel Quinn

 

Tao of the Wu by Rza

Some of Rza on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Th-CEx-NEms

 

A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius by David Eggers

 

The Descent of Man by Grayson Perry

 

The Courage To Be Disliked- Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga

 

Zen & The Art of Motorcycle Maintenance by Robert M. Pirsig

(Without even reading this great book the story of it may be inspirational in terms of tenacity: “Pirsig received a remarkable 126 rejections before an editor finally accepted it for publication–and he did so thinking it would never make a bit of profit. Then it was on best-selling lists for decades. Initially, the book sold at least 5 million copies worldwide.”

Audiobook of Zen & the Art of” on youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ClA9wO8GaqQ

xo

Mistress T

PS: Got suggestions? Please put them in the comments! Thanks!

A Not So Unlikely Friendship with TS Rianna James

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Those who have followed me closely might have noticed some hot scenes featuring women with cocks. Some of those scenes are particularly hot because of my acute attraction to the person. I don’t have a fetish for trans women as a concept, I’ve just really been into some who I’ve had the opportunity to work with.

I confess, when I first saw Rianna, I didn’t know she was trans. I just thought she was a sexy human. I found her smile infectious. We’d run into each other at parties, we had many mutual friends & acquaintances. There might have been flirting.

I liked her as a person & eventually I was intrigued by the idea of what she had under her skirt.

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We’ve become closer lately & I’ve enjoyed taking pics & vids of her. You might find it titillating knowing that I was behind the camera for recent & upcoming pics/vids.

Rianna loves interacting with fans on cam. Like, really loves it. She’s quite the expert on many sexual topics & I feel she has a lot to teach guys about orgasm control, ass play, water sports, worship, BDSM, sexual health, as well as combining some holistic techniques to achieve better orgasms.

She doesn’t need any promotion from me. She’s plenty busy & turns business away as she also has a well-balanced personal life. (Though if you’re curious: https://www.tsriannajames.com/) I guess I just want to brag about a neat person I’m getting to know…& to do one of those things I’m passionate about: humanizing sex workers. Trans sex workers in particular are often objectified. Rianna is a playful sex tsunami but she’s also a great cook, likes flower arranging, is sweet to my pet Lovebird, enjoys yoga, watches at least an hour every day of educational youtube vids to expand her knowledge & is good to people. She’s got her head screwed on right & her positive attitude has injected some lovely energy into my life.

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xo

Mistress T

Members Site: www.MistressT.net

C4S (Buy vids or just send a TRIBUTE! I love random tributes!): http://www.clips4sale.com/23869

IWantClips: https://iwantclips.com/store/57715/Mistress-T

Manyvids: https://www.manyvids.com/MistressT

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

Let’s catch up!

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Hello darlings,

It’s been awhile so we have much to catch up on!

My book came out in December which ended up being more emotional than I had prepared for. If you’re one of the many who have now read it you might think it naive for me to say that but it was all logistics at the end, pushing to get it out before xmas. When the feedback started to come in I was a bit caught off guard. The first wave came from my keenest fans and closest peers in the industry, so the feedback was effusive, often very personal and intimate.

I then made the book available to my personal circle, something I hadn’t thought I’d do but the feedback was so positive from the adult industry I decided to make myself even more vulnerable by inviting people in my private life to read it. I have a fairly large social circle having been an active part of the kink party and sex party or “swinger” community for many years.

I’ve already used the term “vulnerable” which describes the feeling most accurately. The interesting thing about that is how it gives others permission to be vulnerable too. Most readers connect with certain aspects of the book, specifically the harder parts. I don’t want to spoil it for anyone who hasn’t read it but I think something meaningful happens when two people connect over a similar challenging experience.

I said it was an emotional time so it bears explaining that my primary relationship of the last few years also ended in the fall. When I made the post about open relationships being the cats ass, all was well. It was actually the healthiest relationship I’d ever had until the last end. I’ll spare you the details. Break-ups are as common as breathing air & the details are really only interesting to those involved.

After the break up I released the book & went on a bit of a rampage, as you do. Sex parties & debauchery. No one could say my life is boring!

I also ended up with a cute pet Lovebird who has been such a joy. She’s very social, loves to be on me as much as possible but can be a little bratty & bitey. Sometimes I feel like I’m dealing with a 4 inch version of myself. Such attitude!

So I’ve been fucking & partying my way through the Canadian winter, basically, while mourning & processing the end of the relationship. I’m grateful for the support of wonderful old & new friends. Lots of sweet cuddling, meaningful conversations & genuine human connection lubricated by a few drinks & punctuated by lots of luscious orgasms.

I have started to work on another book, fiction this time & in collaboration with a professional writer. It will likely take a couple years so don’t get too excited yet. I’m passionate about the project & it’s nice to feel that. I won’t say much about it now but I assure you that my fans will find it irresistible.

I’m toying with the idea of working more behind the camera. In the fall I enjoyed running camera & directing a couple of scenes for Samantha Mack. I may work with a local mainstream performer who wants to start creating her own FemDom/fetish content, most likely cuckolding. It would be nice to pass on some of the knowledge I’ve amassed in the last decade. Stay tuned for that collaboration.

Speaking of cuckolding…I am now open to meeting men who are interested in a real life cuckolding relationship.

1. He must live in Vancouver. I am 100% NOT interested in a long distance thing even if there is the potential to move here at some point.

2. He must be financially secure. I am not looking for a client but I’m also not looking for someone who may need my financial support at some point.

3. He must be emotionally mature & a high level communicator.

4. He must LOVE me having sex with other men & women. I prefer he not be with others unless I arrange it. I know, I’m a control freak but there are men who are into this arrangement, I’ve talked to dozens over the years.

5. I must like him, respect him & genuinely enjoy his company. I’m looking for more of a loving cuckold relationship. I don’t mind a little playful verbal humiliation but if he really needs to be degraded or demeaned, I’m not into it.

6. I do not care if he wants to be in chastity or not, if he has a working penis or not, if he wants to be denied orgasms or have them controlled. I don’t care if he’s bisexual or if he does or does not want to suck cock/eat cum. Pussy licking is mandatory though. He must love worshiping pussy & be willing to take instruction to learn how I like it.

7. I don’t particularly care how old he is but for compatibility I think within 10 years of me one way or the other would be best. I’m 42, so I likely won’t have much in common with a 25 year old or a 60 year old. You’re welcome to try to prove me wrong but please don’t waste my time. I am selective.

The ideal candidate would be mid 30’s to mid 40’s, be really into his partner having sex with other men but prefers to be devoted to one woman himself. He should be self aware & able to communicate his feelings as well as empathetic & considerate of others. He needs to have his shit together in life in general.

Note: You would not be involved with filming. You would not be an onscreen cuckold. This would be a personal relationship completely outside of my work.

Sound like you? Send me an email of introduction. I will ask anyone interested to read my book before I’ll meet them. It’s not to jack up book sales as the book was never designed to make me money, but if you read the book you’ll understand why it’s mandatory.

Here’s the link to my book “There Is More To The Story” on Amazon, kindle & paperback: https://www.amazon.ca/There-More-Story-Mistress-T

Email: MsT@MistressT.net (Stop. Before you get excited & send a stupid email with one hand on your dick, think. You won’t get a second chance to make a first impression. I’ve said I’m looking for someone emotionally mature. It’s hard to fake that. You’re not writing to the fantasy character “Mistress T”. You’re writing to the very real life multidimensional human who is looking for a real life relationship that has absolutely nothing to do with her job. If you haven’t read my book yet I strongly recommend you do so before writing me. Don’t worry, I don’t expect very many applicants due to the narrow geographic area of Vancouver only, so there’s no rush.)

xo

Mistress T

Members Site: www.MistressT.net

C4S (Buy vids or just send a TRIBUTE! I love random tributes!): http://www.clips4sale.com/23869

IWantClips: https://iwantclips.com/store/57715/Mistress-T

Manyvids: https://www.manyvids.com/MistressT

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

 

Keeping Casual Sex Respectful

Version 2

“I hope you don’t feel like you’re not enough?”

This is what I asked my “side guy” the other day & our conversation got me thinking about the art of balancing multiple relationships. I thought the topic might be of interest to my readers.

I’ve been with the same partner for a few years. It’s the deepest & healthiest relationship I’ve ever been in. We also practice consensual non-monogamy. That’s the term I use instead of “swingers” (which sounds like we’re partying every weekend, wife swapping) or “poly” (polyamory usually means more than one equal emotional romantic relationship).

I like the term “non-monogamous” as it allows us to define what it is for us & for it to evolve.

I currently have one other regular partner, my “side guy”, who I get together with a few times a month. He’s fun, sexy, sane, drama-free & “gets it”, as in he’s been in a similar relationship so understand things from the other side. He respects my relationship & my primary partner. He doesn’t try to seduce me into falling in love with him or any nonsense.

He just wants lighter connections at this time having recently exited a draining long term relationship. I’m not his only lover & he’s not wanting to get serious with anyone, but he does prefer to like who he’s fucking.

It’s going great but the other day it occurred to me that he could feel objectified or feel inadequate, like he’s not enough.

I thought about how powerful, sexually liberated women high five each other & talk about using boy toys & tossing them away, like men don’t have feelings. I’d argue that if a man is so void of emotional depth that he’s content to be only used like a human dildo maybe he’s not really worth fucking? I know this goes against all the “FemDom sex” vids I’ve done where I just use men for their cocks & ya know what? That stuff is still hot & it has it’s place…but in my efforts to educate, to define the differences between fantasy & reality, I want to just be real here & say that mutual respect & consideration can be more fulfilling than an objectifying, disposable fuck.

There’s a fine line though, isn’t there? Liking the person you’re fucking could lead to loving the person you’re fucking. How do you maintain healthy boundaries? In my case it’s easy to do but hard to articulate. I guess I treat a casual lover as I would a really good friend. What I have with my main/primary partner is much deeper & more complex.

I could probably debate the nuances of these kinds of relationships & interactions with each of my readers or write a ridiculously long blog post that no one would read. I’m aware that I need to keep these things brief as attention spans are preciously short.

I’ll sum up, leaving too much out no doubt. Feel free to comment to expand the conversation. If you’re having “casual sex”, it’s okay to care about your partner. You can be kind, compassionate & respectful without falling head over heels in love…& you can have a mainly physical relationship with someone AND expect them to treat you with kindness, compassion & respect. There’s nothing wrong with mutually enjoying carnal pleasure with someone you don’t want to be in a full relationship with. There’s a lot of factors that might not line up for a relationship, compatibility & all that. It doesn’t mean that they or you are not enough, not good enough, worthless, disposable or only good for one thing.

So to answer the question I opened the blog with, he thought for a moment before responding: “I could feel that way & it might make sense, but I don’t. You are generous with compliments. You treat me with respect. I know you have something special with your partner & you’re not wanting to replace him, this is just extra fun for you. We’re good.”

Wish me luck as I continue to tight rope walk thru non-monogamy:-)

xo

Mistress T

Members Site: www.MistressT.net

C4S (Buy vids or just send a TRIBUTE! I love random tributes!): http://www.clips4sale.com/23869

IWantClips: https://iwantclips.com/store/57715/Mistress-T

Manyvids: https://www.manyvids.com/MistressT

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

 

Looking for an apprentice

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I’ve been in this biz for over a decade & have been successful where many others have not. It seems a shame to hoard all this experience & knowledge.

The hardest part about the biz is getting started. The learning curve is sharp & getting noticed in a sea of competition is problematic.

I can help with those two things. I can help get things set up, she can even use my stuff until she gets her own (camera, lights, editing software, wardrobe, props, sets, film slaves, etc.). I can promote her to my established fan base. That’s key.

Who would be ideal? A mini-me. Someone who looks similar to me, but younger. Probably 25-30, give or take.

She should have raw talent, a gift of the gab, public speaking or acting experience. I pretty much never shut up in my vids. I’m very verbal so if I’m going to promote someone to my fans I think it’s best that she is as similar to me as possible. I know a lot of gals have tried to copy my verbals. So far I haven’t seen anyone do it convincingly well. I can teach some techniques but there has to be raw talent to build on.

She should be in a place in her life to commit to this. I did it full time from the start & put in the hours. This is a full time commitment, but the money will be worth it. After 3-5 years you can work less, but you’ve got to build the business & fan base first.

She must WANT to do this job. It will eat your soul if you only do it for the money. You don’t have to be into every fetish or even any fetish, maybe you just love performing/acting or you get a kick out of making guys do things. Whatever your motivation, it must not be only about money.

She must have her head screwed on straight. I’m looking for a strong, confident, ambitious, independent bad ass bitch. You don’t have to be perfect to be a bad ass bitch who can rock this job. I have struggled with life stuff & mental health issues over the years but I was driven enough to make it look pretty seamless to the outside world. The show must go on. The flexible hours make this a great option for some who struggle with personal issues but you have to be functional enough & self-motivated enough to get what needs to be done, done, on a regular basis.

I think it makes sense to do this training in person (not over cam). I even have a spare room in my house. I have no idea how to ensure I’m fairly compensated for the incredible opportunity I’m offering but I suppose we can cross that bridge if the right candidate presents herself. I’m obviously not offering this for free.

So if you’re reading this & your heart is pounding…you’re looking in the mirror & thinking you could pass for my younger sister, reach out & say hi. Ya never know. MsT@MistressT.net

x

Mistress T

Members Site: www.MistressT.net

C4S (Buy vids or just send a TRIBUTE! I love random tributes!): http://www.clips4sale.com/23869

IWantClips: https://iwantclips.com/store/57715/Mistress-T

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

Aging In The Adult Industry

Mature Domme tip #107: You may not have the energy you had in your younger years. Keep a slave handy to use as a chair for when you need a little rest.

Mature Domme tip #107: You may not have the energy you had in your younger years. Keep a slave handy to use as a chair for when you need a little rest.

My birthday is tomorrow, Apr 29. I’ll be 41. So what’s it like aging in the adult industry?

Unlike the typical porn starlet, I was late to the biz. I started as a private dancer in a strip club when I was 28. The other gals where years younger except one & she didn’t really ‘dance’ for anyone. She had a few regulars who would pay her to sit & drink with them.

I dipped in & out of the adult industry for a few years & was about 32 by the time my fetish video business was full steam ahead. I started referring to myself as a MILF in the early days & added ‘mature’ soon after. The oldest among my peer group they sometimes refer to me as ‘Nana’ (& sometimes Mistress Goofball, but this isn’t a post about how hilarious I am.)

In a lot of survey’s, “MILF” is a very popular search term, often ranking higher than ‘teen’. Here’s some stats: https://www.pornhub.com/insights/2016-year-in-review

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So in a world that in every other way tells you that as a women your value nose dives after 40 (or even after 35), I work in an industry where not only am I highly valued, there’s a lot less competition. I’ve even hammed up the older bit by wearing a grey wig & you’ll often see me in glasses, pearl necklaces, satin blouses or suites. For business, I’m not trying to pretend I’m younger, if anything, the opposite.

Silver fox:-)

Silver fox:-)

How many adult film performers are still in the biz after 40? A helleva lot less than those in their 20’s.

I have received some very generous offers from various big porn production companies who are desperate for MILF’s. I’m not really interested in working with other companies these days but since I find Virtual Reality fascinating you might see a VR fuck scene with me on HologirlsVR this year. My understanding is a key VR sex position requires me to straddle & ride a cock for several minutes & frankly, I’m not sure my knees will take it. ha ha

Yeah, I might need a helper to lift me up & down in this position. Sheesh.

Yeah, I might need a helper to lift me up & down in this position. Sheesh. (Find these scenes on https://www.hologirlsvr.com)

Anyway, back to how I feel about things. I’ll be honest, in the real world I don’t have the same ‘pull’ that I used to. Men don’t quite look at me the same, or look at me at all. Online though, things heat up more each year. Business is booming, sales numbers don’t lie, plus I get loads of messages from men of all ages desiring an older woman.

As if by cruel design though, with each passing year I become more settled, with less inclination to travel, with less energy to work, with less drive to work as hard as I did in the beginning. Finally achieving work-life balance I am no longer married to my work, I have a full & rich life outside of the biz. With an eye to the future I wonder when it will make sense to start to wind down the business. A recent meeting with my financial advisor, he posed the usual questions which were mathematical to him but personal to me: “How much longer do you think you’ll make this income? When will you need to start drawing on your investments? Etc.”

I really don’t know? My heart is still in it but when is the tipping point when I’m no longer a ‘hot MILF’ but I’ve gone ‘past my expiry date’? Of course I want to end on a high note & not drag things out to the point of embarrassment. I know I’m not near that yet but geez, ya know what I mean?

In writing this I did some research on Bettie Page. I thought that she had at one point decided to retire, maybe in her mid 30’s & had never let another photograph be taken of her. That she wanted to be remembered by her fans how she was. Unfortunately my research resulted in a less romantic explanation. She may have actually found religion. So I can’t draw any parallels here about Bettie Page feeling her age, etc. I’ll move on without Ms. Page.

Personally, I love getting older mentally. I wouldn’t want to go back to knowing less, having experienced less. Physically, I don’t think anyone is happy about aging. No one says: “Thank god my skin is starting to wrinkle! I’ve been waiting for this for too long!” The cosmetic industry is booming thanks to people fighting growing old tooth & nail. I’m not convinced there’s such a thing as growing old gracefully & there’s so few women in the public eye doing it naturally that most of us wouldn’t even know what it looks like anymore. I won’t stay on that topic as I know men would prefer to stay blissfully unaware of what women do to look good, while men often consider combing their hair as stepping up their game & trimming their nose hairs as ‘extreme grooming’. Ha ha

The book I’ve been writing is about my life. It’s been amazing working with my editor, going back through & discussing details of various chapters of my story. Seeing how events & experiences shaped who I am. Some pleasant, some not, but it all contributed. I hoped to have the book done in my 40th year & although that didn’t happen, the majority of the work on it happened in my 40th year & it will be done long before my 42nd.

Turning back toward aging in this industry…it’s amazing actually. In the real world as I start to become invisible…as I’m overlooked by more men, I am becoming more desirable to certain fans. Sure, being fetishized for being ‘older’ is somewhat objectifying, like being fetishized for being an Asian woman, a black man, a BBW, etc. but most people tend to be drawn to certain physical traits, I don’t really see anything wrong with that. We like what we like, & for men seeking a mature woman, their options are more limited in porn…& here I am. Experienced, still good lookin’ & not planning to make my exit anytime soon.

Oh…& in case you felt inclined to send me a treat for my birthday, here’s my updated wish lists:

Canadian Amazon.ca wish list: Click here

US Amazon.com wish list: Click here

xo

Mistress T

Members Site: www.MistressT.net

C4S: http://www.clips4sale.com/23869

IWantClips: https://iwantclips.com/store/57715/Mistress-T

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

 

A Duo Session with Miss Jasmine

Mistress T & Miss Jasmine

Nearly a decade ago in the early days of being Professional Dominatrix’s in Vancouver, Miss Jasmine & I became friends. We did basically the same work & occasionally did sessions together. We’ve supported each other as our careers & lives have evolved.

Jasmine recently reached out to set up a duo session with a client of hers who requested me. I still like doing sessions, I just dislike the process of setting up a session with a new person. Poor communication & flakiness abound. Being contacted for a session by another professional makes the process a breeze. All the pertinent information (without the fluff) is efficiently exchanged & arrangements are firmed up quickly.

The date was set. She & I would have lunch before & then head to his hotel together. He was into a bit of bondage & sensual Domination, feet, hosiery, face sitting (clothed) & anal play/strap-on. It’s rather easy to fill up 90 minutes with those activities.

Jasmine had seen this client many times before & knew him well. He had been a fan of my vids for years & knew my style. That certainly helped with the comfort level. Things were more likely to go smoother.

We arrived & there were hugs all around. Hugging a stranger might seem a bit odd but within an hour I will have touched his private parts, a lot, & have shoved my crotch in his face, might as well get the physical contact part going right away.

He had a bottle of bubbly on ice. We decided to indulge.

Some Dommes won’t drink alcohol during a session. For me, it depends on safety really. How safe I feel with the client & what activities I’m doing. For example, I wouldn’t drink alcohol if I would be doing sounding or CP, but foot worship, face sitting & especially golden showers: sure.

For ladies reading this here’s how I feel safest: The bottle is unopened, I open it & pour my own drink. I don’t leave my drink unattended & the client drinks from the same container. This may sound paranoid but drinks getting spiked is a thing & better safe than sorry.

In my experience a drink or two can enhance the session for both parties, loosen you both up a bit. There is obviously a difference between a drink or two vs. getting smashed & out of control. A very drunk client is no fun to deal with & getting drunk yourself is unprofessional.

The view from his hotel room was stunning. I took a moment after getting changed, to admire the view & sip my drink. I’m sure the view of me in lingerie & heels from behind was a nice view for him too.

We stripped him & tied him spread eagle to the bed. He was grinning ear-to-ear & his cock was already standing at attention, twitching into the air. The next while was likely a blur to him as Jasmine & I took turns putting our feet in his face, sitting on his face & teasing his horny cock. Jasmine had brought some special smelly goodies for him (he has been buying her worn items for years). She had socks she’d worn for a couple weeks & a pair of well-worn panties. She held them over his face & made him breath deeply. He was in heaven. He kept saying he couldn’t believe we were both there & this was really happening.

Out came the rubber gloves, lube & toys/strap-ons. We incorporated ass play into the fun, moving him around in different positions, fucking him while he was on his back, doggy style & laying down doggy. At one point I was fucking him from behind while his face was buried between Jasmine’s thighs, inhaling her scent through her panties & we were left looking at each other. It was a funny moment already really, us facing each other with this guy between us having this incredible experience. I started to pull faces to make her laugh, crossing my eyes, lolling my tongue out & thrusting dramatically. She was trying hard to not laugh at loud to ruin the moment & like a jerk I just dialed up the funny faces, trying harder to make her lose it. I threw my head back, rolling my eyes back & smiling like a maniac. Poor Jasmine had to clamp her hand over her mouth to keep from laughing out loud. I loved it!

We ended things with him on his back, Jasmine fucking him in the ass with her strap-on & jerking him off while I kept my feet on his face, his eyes darting back & forth between us. I was doing my usual dirty talk, encouraging him along. He was begging enthusiastically to be allowed to cum, Jasmine laughing & holding off on giving him permission…I think most Dommes adore that moment, when a guy is right at the edge of orgasm & he’ll do just about anything to cum but also just about anything to not cum without permission, it’s incredibly powerful to have a man in that vulnerable position.

When she gave permission his whole body convulsed & he looked & sounded in every way to be cumming for at least 20 seconds before the ejaculate came out of his cock. His face was a mix of ecstasy & shock. He was muttering that he didn’t know what just happened. He was explaining that it felt like he came twice in a row. We had been working his ass for about a half hour, he likely had a prostate orgasm just before he actually ejaculated & that is a shocking experience for a lot of guys. A happy surprise *smile*.

I nuzzled his face into my cleavage & kissed his forehead. I’m known for a bit of sweetness at this point in a session, if I feel it’s appropriate. Most guys really love this part, no matter what kind of session it’s been. A bit of tenderness & a quiet moment after cumming.

As we tidied & packed up he kept expressing his joyful confusion about his orgasm & about what an amazing experience he had had. The gratitude was nice to hear. We all like to feel like we’ve done a good job, a sense of pride in accomplishment, don’t we?

You can find more of Miss Jasmine here: http://eurasianpersuasion.com/ & here: http://clips4sale.com/studio/18927

xo

Mistress T

Members Site: www.MistressT.net

C4S: http://www.clips4sale.com/23869

IWantClips: https://iwantclips.com/store/57715/Mistress-T

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

Canadian Amazon.ca wish list: Click here

US Amazon.com wish list: Click here

Who is the man who gets what u want?

Who made this mess? ....& who is going to clean it up???

Who made this mess?
….& who is going to clean it up???

Do you ever wonder who gets to be with me? Like really gets to be with me in the most intimate ways?

A few years ago I was fairly public about being single & looking but I wasn’t as vocal about my relationship when one did develop. Trying to balance some kind of private life with my public persona can be tricky. Part of me wants to keep some things just for myself & part of me wants y’all to know a lot about me to reduce the objectification of adult performers & sex workers. Like me shouting: “Hey, look at me! I’m a regular person like everyone else. I just have an unusual job. I grocery shop, I binge watch Netflix, I have complex relationships with family & friends, I’ve been in love, had my heart broken, I’ve made mistakes & hurt people I cared about, I wear flannel pj’s, I have opinions…I am a human, not just a sex doll with a pulse!”

Which brings me to this post…about my partner, which I know many of you are curious about. The reason I do it now is because I believe that he could actually help some of you. I’ll explain.

As you can well imagine, I’m not everyone’s cup of tea. Is it hard to be in a relationship with a “Dominatrix” or “Porn Star”? Sure, for some guys, however, my partner is the most emotionally mature man I’ve ever met. There is no power dynamic in our relationship. Neither is Dominant. We are equals. It’s the healthiest relationship I’ve ever been in.

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He’s a high level communicator, intuitive, intelligent, empathetic, open-minded & sexually skilled. He’s self assured because he brings qualities to a relationship that are lacking in many men. How do most men learn to find & build a healthy relationship? How do most men learn to be better partners & lovers? Although the education exists it isn’t mainstream & I’ll tell you, unfortunately the majority of men aren’t skilled lovers or good partners. That’s just the harsh truth.

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Over the years I’ve had requests from fans who wanted to serve my lovers or boyfriends. He’s been dabbling in that, chatting with & doing cam with a few of my fans. He’s rather good at it & enjoys it. It’s become a fun little hobby of his & sometimes we go on cam together with my fans which is fun for me too.

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Beyond fetish sessions (laughing at my sissy cuckolds & slaves who get off on humiliation, forced bi or Financial Domination) I feel like some fans could benefit from a bit of coaching. This is the guy who ‘got’ ME. The guy who won my heart & sexually satisfies me. He is superior for that reason alone & all my cuckolds should worship him for that…but other guys who just want advice on how to communicate with women in real life, especially the type of women they crave: self-assured, successful, Dominate women. How to start & build a meaningful relationship with that kind of woman. How to please a woman sexually. Sex tips & individualized training on being a better partner & lover. He can do that & the domino effect is some women will be happier with better men. It’s ninja-level FemDom when you think about it: my good man training men to better please other women. I love it!

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Sure, a lot of you will just want to go on cam for 10 minutes & jerk off while he laughs at you & tells you that you’re inferior…& it’s hot because he is a superior male who gets to fuck the woman you’ve been jerking off to for years…& it’s hot because he’s a good looking younger bi guy who gets off on the idea of making my cuckolds suck his cock & eat his cum…& yes, he is happy to do that…but he can also do so much more.

Of course ur not gay…but u can’t deny that’s a great ass…

Admit it, u like his ass...ur drawn to it...

Admit it, u like his ass…ur drawn to it…

...so drawn to it that I bet u'd lick it if I told u to. Now it's all u'll be able to think about...

…so drawn to it that I bet u’d lick it if I told u to.
Now it’s all u’ll be able to think about…

For example, he can assist with erectile dysfunction & orgasm control…he’s a professional tantra practitioner & works solo or does double sessions with the very talented Olivia Jade (http://oliviajade.net/). Olivia is one of, if not the most highly regarded certified tantra practitioner in Canada. She helps a lot of men with ED & premature ejaculation, among other things. I highly recommend her services as well.

So, if you want to ‘serve my man’ (via skype cam or messenger/email ) in the usual dirty ways: cuckolding, forced bi, humiliation, jerk off instruction, cum eating instruction, etc. & you’re in a position to be generous, reach out to me & I’ll coordinate it. We can both be involved or you can serve just him. Or, if you think you could benefit from chatting with an evolved man who in my experienced opinion is an expert at having a healthy relationship AND is also highly sexually skilled…send me a note:

MsT@MistressT.net

As I mentioned, this is just a fun little hobby for him & his time is limited so he will give his attention to those who are the most generous & enjoyable to deal with. This is a rare & valuable opportunity so conduct yourself accordingly. That means:

  • communicate clearly about what you’re hoping for/wanting/what you’re into
  • be ready & able to tribute to show you’re serious
  • be respectful & reliable

Those things go for me as well!

You only live once!

Mistress T

Members Site: www.MistressT.net

C4S: http://www.clips4sale.com/23869

IWantClips: https://iwantclips.com/store/57715/Mistress-T

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

Canadian Amazon.ca wish list: Click here

US Amazon.com wish list: Click here