Monthly Archives: May 2016

If I knew then what I know now…

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mistresst_lace_dress_cleavage1

This blog post will likely not be titillating. That’s your fair warning if you were hoping for jerk off material. My vids are GREAT jerk off material, by the way:-)

Last night I hosted a focus group for a friend of mine who is planning to start an initiative for educating young women on sex issues. The purpose of the focus group was to find out what topics should be covered in more depth, to find out what young women want to know more about.

I was in attendance as a more experienced woman in the areas of sexual health, fetish/BDSM/kink, fetish parties, non-monogamy, consent, etc. I asked another mature female friend of mine to attend who has extensive knowledge in tantra, mindful masturbation, connection/intimacy, etc. (She’s well known for her tantra sessions, intimacy coaching, etc.: http://oliviajade.net/)

The conversation moved organically around a variety of topics: how to communicate with your lover about how you like to be touched & pleasured, dealing with lovers who have erectile dysfunction or low sex drive, tips on giving better blowjobs/handjobs, mutual masturbation, safer sex practices, how & where to get STI testing, where to get sex toys, sexual safety, consent & techniques to navigate date rape & non-violent sexual assault, helpful books to read, where to get fetish attire for fetish parties, birth control, how to teach a guy to clean his foreskin properly, learning how to have better orgasms, opening monogamous relationship up to include others, etiquette at sex parties or swinger parties, how to discuss your kinks or curiosities with a new partner…I deliberately just rattled off random topics because that’s how the conversation went, organically, naturally, moving from one topic to the next. We covered a lot of ground & in the end my friend got quite a few topic ideas that could be dedicated sessions.

In the beginning it was awkward but as we all became more comfortable & familiar I could see the value in this. Mature, more experienced women there to answer questions & give advice, younger women coming together & hearing each others questions, knowing that they aren’t alone or the only ones who have dealt with difficult situations or the only ones who don’t know certain things. The younger women were very appreciative of the opportunity & I’m a sucker for feeling appreciated. I for sure will be volunteering my home & myself for anything like this in the future.

I have been thinking for awhile of doing a series of non-pornographic vids for younger men. Vids that educate & help them to become better lovers & more intimately ‘connected’ to themselves. I would cover topics like masturbation techniques to prepare themselves for sex with another person, communication techniques to improve sex with another person, hygiene & grooming, consent/respect/compassion, understanding that most porn is entertainment not education/unlearning bad habits formed from watching porn, how to discuss your kinks with a new partner, etc. After last night I feel inspired to educate both young men & women. If I had known then what I know now! Well, I can help some of them get valuable info that will make their sex lives better, reduce anxiety, shame, confusion, etc.

If you have a topic you’d like me to cover in an educational vid please use the comments section here on my blog.

Best,
Mistress T

Members site: http://www.MistressT.net
PPV: http://www.clips4sale.com/23869
Blog: http://www.MistressT.net/blog/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

POV vs. Voyeur?

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Do you prefer porn where you are passively watching the action like a voyeur or when you feel more directly involved?

I was just contemplating POV (point-of-view) style filming, where the performer looks directly at the camera lens, connecting with the viewer, sometimes speaking directly to the viewer. Like in ‘virtual fucking’ where I’m alone with the camera but the angles give the viewer the feeling I’m riding his cock or face…or when there’s a stunt cock in the scene but the camera angle is set up basically where his head is so the viewer feels like the cock in the vid is his…or the view from where a cuckold might be, or a slave inside a cage, etc.

From "Cum Drinking Cock Sucking Sissy"

From “Cum Drinking Cock Sucking Sissy”

From a POV virtual fucking scene "MILF Sex Ed"

From a POV virtual fucking scene “MILF Sex Ed”

From "Mindblowing Handjob"

From “Mindblowing Handjob”

From "Foot Worship POV"

From “Foot Worship POV”

From "Latex Gloves Ruined Twice"

From “Latex Gloves Ruined Twice”

From "Beg For Release"

From “Beg For Release”

I was thinking about this in relation to some of the virtual reality filming I’ve done recently with HologirlsVR (www.HoloGirlsVR.com). Full virtual reality (with the goggles) is certainly more immersive but more on that another day.

hologirls_banner_screenshot

I understand a lot of my viewers have had little or no sex…or little or no kinky/FemDom/fetish experiences. It can be hard enough for some guys to get laid at all but even harder in the real world for guys to get to live out their niche fantasies. I realize that watching my vids & imagining they are right there or they are the guy in the scene is as close as many of my fans will get to a real experience…be it a cuckold experience, or real humiliation experience, or even foot worship!

Watching my vids is a safe, discreet way to get their kink on & in some situations it’s probably better than the real thing. One could argue that the thrill & fulfillment from an in-person experience can’t be matched but one could counter argue that real life seldom lives up to expectations. It really depends. It’s a gamble.

It’s certainly a lot more cost effective to jerk off to a $10 vid than to spend hundreds on an in-person session with a Professional Dominatrix, although if you have the money that’s certainly a better option than spending hundred of hours trawling dating sites trying to find a woman who is into the same kinks, lives near by & with whom you get along with otherwise.

With this in mind I put in a lot of effort to genuinely connect to my viewer. I know that this experience might be the closest they ever get to living out their fantasies. I try to make it as real as possible.

I wonder how this is different from just watching the action in a porn vid where the performers don’t look at the camera & don’t address the viewer. It’s very rare for me to do a scene like this. Even if I’m doing a scene with a guy I usually address the viewer at some point, even if it’s just making eye contact with the camera lens, to let the viewer know I know he’s watching. They call that “breaking the 4th wall” in movie-making & theater. Deadpool does a lot of that & even points it out. (Side note: LOVED the movie Deadpool!).

But it can pull you out of the fantasy. It was certainly a no-no to look at the camera during most filming traditionally.

So, I wonder how ‘voyeur’ style porn vs. “POV” style porn effects the sexual development of men, young & older? Would POV style porn better prepare a guy for the real thing? I wonder how a guys body responds to POV vs. voyeur style scenes? For example, when I put the goggles on to view VR (virtual reality) scenes & I looked up to see a woman standing over me my body had a very noticeable physical reaction. My body did not know there wasn’t a real person there. I automatically reached up to touch her & it felt like I could.

The voyeur aspect of just watching people having sex or doing a FemDom scene, ignoring the camera certainly has its place too. That’s a style of viewing we’re certainly more used to. It’s how most TV shows, movies & traditional porn is presented.

From "Your Cuckolding Vid"

From “Your Cuckolding Vid”

From "Ball Abuse Ass Tease"

From “Ball Abuse Ass Tease”

I’m curious to hear your thoughts on this topic. Please share your feedback in the comments area here on my blog so others can see & respond community-style (not on twitter or email, that doesn’t make sense really. Thanks!)

Best,
Mistress T

Members site: http://www.MistressT.net
PPV: http://www.clips4sale.com/23869
Blog: http://www.MistressT.net/blog/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet