Tag Archives: objectification

Great news: My book is officially published!

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My book is officially published, launched & paperbacks are starting to be delivered!

After three years of working on it, I can tell you that it’s a big relief. The kindle version has already sold very well and the positive feedback is pouring in. There’s quite a few reviews posted on Amazon but I’ve received far more directly. An emotional part of this journey I  hadn’t quite prepared for was the one-on-one discussions with people. Some of whom I know, some I don’t, who have read the book & feel the need to talk with me about it.

I’m told it’s hard to put down and an emotional roller coaster. Certain parts seem to really hit a nerve for a lot of people.

You can find it on Amazon (which ever one is right for you). You can search “There Is More To The Story” by Mistress T. It’s available on Kindle or paperback.

Here’s the link for Amazon.com:

https://www.amazon.com/There-More-Story-Mistress-T/dp/1999555104/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1546906000&sr=8-1

Please rate & review on Amazon, it really helps! xo

Frequently asked questions:

“Will there be an audio book with me (Mistress T) narrating?” ~ This always was & still is the plan but I have yet to figure out how to do this, technically. I’m working on it. No ETA.

“The paperback is showing as out of stock on Amazon, when will it be available?” ~ It is available. Order it anyway even if it says it’s out of stock. It will likely come way faster than it says it will.

“Can I get a signed copy?” ~ Yes, but…I consider this to be a luxury. This isn’t a cash grab for me, I just really don’t enjoy the process of going to the post office to mail things and no, I don’t have a slave to do stuff like that for me. The book itself also costs me. So I’ve listed the price as $200USD including shipping for a signed copy. The kindle version is less than $10 & the paperback around $25 so there are certainly options for any budget. To order a signed copy please send the $200 payment via the tribute button on either Clips4sale or IWantClips (links in signature below) & include in the comments your email address, mailing address & who to sign the book to. You can also email me to make other arrangements: MsT@MistressT.net

“Which way of buying is better/more profitable for the author?” ~ The best thing you can do is rate & review it on Amazon. At the moment the book is really only being marketed to my fans, which is fine, but after investing thousands of my own money (editing, design, not to mention my time) I will likely never even come close to making a profit…and that’s okay! I did it more to humanize sex workers than make money. However, I think there’s a chance it might reach a wider audience on Amazon if I get a lot of reviews. So that is the most helpful thing you can do for me! Thanks:-)

“Will you write another book?” ~ I have an idea for another book I hope to write. This one fiction but the main character would be a Dominatrix, loosely based on me. Probably two years for that but I’ll of course not keep it secret as things progress. I already have some interest from publishers for that one so the timeline might be shorter as I self-published the first one & being my first time, it took longer for me to navigate that process.

A huge thank you to those who have read & will read my book. It was a vulnerable thing to write and put out into the world but I think it’s an important book for our time, to help humanize sex workers.

xo

Mistress T

Members Site: www.MistressT.net

C4S (Buy vids or just send a TRIBUTE! I love random tributes!): http://www.clips4sale.com/23869

IWantClips: https://iwantclips.com/store/57715/Mistress-T

Manyvids: https://www.manyvids.com/MistressT

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

Sex Workers: Now Available In Human Form!

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I just read this great article “What It’s Like To Be A Mom & A Sex Worker”:

https://www.romper.com/p/what-its-like-to-be-a-mom-a-sex-worker-48312

I wanted to share it as a nod to the women I know in the industry who are mom’s & I really wanted men to read it as yet another way to humanize sex workers.

I write often in my blog about the objectification of women & how important it is to educate & remind people that sex workers are multi-dimensional beings with lives outside of sex work, with hopes & fears, dreams & disappointments, quirks, families, friends, hobbies, feelings, etc. Yup, even that ‘cum-dumpster’ you just jerked off to who took a load of cum on her face while getting fucked in the ass…has a whole life outside of your fantasy. Maybe she volunteers at a soup kitchen or animal shelter, maybe she has kids or an aging parent she takes care of, maybe she teaches yoga, maybe she plays the same video games you do, maybe she bakes the best cookies or fixes up old cars. Sure, maybe she’s dealing with childhood trauma & struggles with addiction or has suicidal thoughts….but ya know what? So do a lot of lawyers, accountants, teachers, mechanics, real estate agents… My point is that sex workers are just people, a slice of the population, like you & the folks around you.

The last paragraph of the article gave me hope & maybe my blog post will contribute to the future this woman sees coming:

“I support anyone’s choice to choose the life that suits them best. It’s hard yet rewarding work to provide nurturing love and companionship to people, whether it’s to my growing daughter or to my grateful clients, and I’m happy to do so. Thankfully, the stigma that sucks joy from my work is slowly dissipating, as people become more progressive and enlightened about their world. And if, in the future, my daughter wants to become a stripper, porn performer, cam-girl, dominatrix, or whatever, I hope she performs just like her mama — with poise, confidence, and a smile.”

Stigma. That word. I’m really sick of it to be honest. Thankfully I mostly don’t care what people think about me in that regard, but on the list of downsides of this occupation “stigma” is the top of the list. The more the world hears & sees sex workers when they’re not doing sex work the more informed people become & the more we can reduce stigma. It’s not easy tho & most don’t want to expose themselves. Most of the women I know in the industry who have kids are careful to hide the fact they have kids from their clients & they are even more careful to keep those who know they have kids from finding out about their profession. The 2 things don’t mix well…but I’ll pull the curtain back & tell you that there’s a hell of a lot of women in the industry who have kids & there’s a hell of a lot of mom’s that are doing sex work. Sex workers who are parents could be excellent secret agents, living double lives, telling lies & keeping secrets. I hope some day it all doesn’t have to be like that.

SIDE NOTE: Unrelated to this article I highly recommend the Netflix series (or book it was based on) “13 Reasons Why”: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/13_Reasons_Why 

It explores some really tough topics that young adults struggle with: bullying, suicide, consent/rape, objectification & how to support young people who are struggling with some of these issues. So although this is particularly pertinent for young adults or the parents of young adults I think anyone would get a lot out of this. Especially the parts about objectifying women in small ways that add up to a bigger problem. It’s easy to think that one comment or incident is no big deal but seeing over the series how little things accumulated…I won’t ruin it for you, but I hope this series becomes required watching & is discussed in classrooms. People need to understand the consequences of their actions, men in particular in this regard (sexual objectification of women) & women need to learn how to better advocate for themselves.

Be kind to yourselves & to each other.

xo

Mistress T

Members Site: www.MistressT.net

C4S: http://www.clips4sale.com/23869

IWantClips: https://iwantclips.com/store/57715/Mistress-T

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

Canadian Amazon.ca wish list: Click here

US Amazon.com wish list: Click here

My version of “FemDom”.

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The debate around what FemDom is or is not is one that seems to never get old. The concept of there being rules for being a proper Dominatrix actually seems rather humorous. To get nude or not, to wank a dick or not, to fuck your slaves or not, etc. It’s a big, wide topic that I’ll narrow to just me for now.

Over the last decade I’ve figured out what feels right for me. It’s been an interesting journey that continues to evolve. At times I’ve tried various things and then decided to not do them anymore. If you’ve been following be since the beginning you might have noticed that some video themes came & went.

When I get custom video requests I often go with my gut. I know by now what I’m going to be comfortable with for personal reasons or in terms of my ‘branding’. As far as my branding is concerned, I’ve spent years trying to do a simple thing: portray myself as a woman who is in control of her body & sexuality and who is also in control of the male’s I interact with.

For me, that is my simple version of FemDom. Female in control. That can take a lot of different forms. It can be sensual or subtle Domination in various roles. It doesn’t have to be linked to physical pain or dungeons.

So when I get requests to do vids where I am in any way objectified, not in full control, like I’m so horny I’ll do something I wouldn’t otherwise do, where a male is in the power role, etc. I know that it’s not right for me.

I feel that the vast majority of porn on the internet portrays women as submissive, weak, often degraded objects there for the pleasure of men. I don’t need to create any more content like that, there’s plenty. I’d like to try to balance things out by offering a different dynamic.

A lot of men want to give up control. They want a woman to initiate & to take her pleasure. They find confidence sexy.  Despite that, the tidal wave of mainstream porn, the music/film industry, media & advertising brainwashing everyone into thinking of women as objects is a powerful force. When so-called fans ask me to do typical mainstream porn acts like take it in the ass, have guys blow their loads on my face, in my mouth, on my tits, on my ass…why ask me for that? Isn’t the billion images on the internet of women doing that enough? Or is it specifically that I don’t that makes it appealing? The whole fucked up thing of persuading women to push their boundaries. A girl in a bikini will get asked to get naked. A naked girl will be asking to masturbate….then jerk a dick, then suck it, then fuck it…but that’s not enough…then she’ll be asked to take it in the ass, then a gang bang, and on and on…until she’s used up. This is exactly how it goes for the majority of women who get into the adult industry.

And I feel the pressure. I have felt it from day 1. The pressure to do more. How no matter what I did, guys always wanted more. Happily there are many loyal fans who love what I do & to them I am eternally grateful. Happily I am able to assert my boundaries & I actually take pleasure in saying: “No, I’m not going to do that.” I enjoy denying men when I sense they are part of the “more!” culture. The pushers. Those addicted to trying to get women to do things they don’t really want to do. There are so many of them & it’s become so accepted that guys don’t even realize it’s a problem…but hey you, if you’ve ever tried to persuade a woman to do something beyond what you think she’s comfortable with: fuck you.

If you want to see what it looks like when a woman is in control of her body & her sexuality study FemDom vids, mine & those in my network of peers. We’re not always perfect, sometimes we try things & they don’t work out like we thought, sometimes we can even seem hypocritical, we’re human, but overall the modeling in healthier. It’s a step closer to equality. FemDom isn’t about equality but it swings the pendulum far enough in the other direction from the usual that it puts a dent in the normalization of female objectification…& I’m happy to do my part.

Mistress T

Members site: http://www.MistressT.net
PPV: http://www.clips4sale.com/23869
Blog: http://www.MistressT.net/blog/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressTdotnet

What do you see?

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What do you see when you look at the picture above? Do you see a Dominant, sexual woman? Maybe I’m inviting you to crawl up those stairs & service my feet or pussy? Do you think I’d want you to fuck me? Can you see the crotch of my panties are wet? Does that tell you I’m already horny & ready? Or does it imply that I’ve already had sex & another man’s cum is seeping out?

The position: legs wide open…along with the look on my face…does it communicate sexual power? Is it intimidating? If you were actually there would you have the balls to actually come closer & try to please me?

Now look at it in a different way…is the picture objectifying? Although not nude, it is overtly sexual & you can almost make out some details of my vagina through the wet crotch. If my expression was a little different, a shy smile & the camera angle was looking down at me…wouldn’t it feel very different? Innocent maybe?

The imbalance of power is so important, isn’t it? Most of the men who read this want me to appear Dominant. They want me to be in control because they so badly crave to give up control. That is the minority though…there are way more images of women portrayed as objects, having things done TO them, etc. As a society, are we naturally more hard wired to find female objectification hot or have we been conditioned to be that way? Even though many of you reading this may not be into female objectification or submissive females…there’s no denying that many, many people are. Not just men either.

There’s a lot more I could say but I’d like to hear from you. Maybe have an open discussion about this rather than just a monologue. There’s a comments section. Please share your thoughts about female objectification, power exchange, etc. Or tell me your first thoughts or what story you created in your mind when you looked at the photo above.

Best,
Mistress T

Members site: http://www.MistressT.net
PPV: http://www.clips4sale.com/23869
Blog: http://www.MistressT.net/blog/
Twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/MistressTdotnet